YouTube Douchebags

What's up guys, welcome to the podcast Views. It's me, David Dobrik, and Jason Nash, and we already started this podcast like 2 days ago, but we played it back and turns out Jason fucked up the audio.

God, that's so, that's so unfair because you didn't do anything, David.

You don't— doesn't matter. Regardless, we're gonna play the podcast now, so bear with us for the first minute because the audio is gonna be a little bit fuzzy. Yeah, it won't happen again because Jason's on a short leash now because he's a fucking idiot.

That was, that was actually really good.

Thanks.

Are you ready to do it? Should I start recording?

I have a feeling we should do in the studio.

Don't make excuses, just lay down the funny and then we can move on with our lives.

All right, let's start it.

Are you ready to start?

Did you already hear?

Well, joke's on you, I've been recording for 13 seconds. Ooh, unfiltered Dobrik.

What's up guys, welcome back to Views. Should I do a cool voice?

We haven't started yet, we're not back from anything. This is in fact, this is the one time you wouldn't say back from something.

Welcome back. What's up guys, welcome to Views.

Welcome to Views, I'm Jason and I'm David. And this is David's idea and he does not want to be here.

This is, this is my idea, but then Jason was like, oh, money! So Jason hopped on it, and Jason's a lot of— Jason's a little more enthusiastic than I am about it.

Well, I'm just excited to get here with my good friend Dave and pay the bills and pay the bills and associate and to, uh, attach myself to a young internet star, and in some way people may think that I am also talented too.

Let me just give you a little background. Jason's 43 years old. He's double my age. I'm 20 years old.

I'm more than double your age.

Yeah, he's more than— I am closer in age to his kids than I am to him.

Yeah, like when, um, when my kids come over and play basketball, they're 11 and David beats the crap out of them. And which I understand after I thought about it. At first I was like, David? But then I was like, oh no, that is what the older kid would do. So how do you want to do this?

I mean, basically we're just going to talk about stuff, right?

Yeah.

Well, we should introduce ourselves since it's the first podcast. Yeah, we don't know what's going on. I mean, I'm David. I started on Vine and now I'm doing a bunch of YouTube videos. I'm really into YouTube. And then I found Jason at a comedy club.

That's a good story.

It's the most cliché, like, way to find a person. Let me just— let me tell you guys how I met Jason, how he was in my life. I did a movie back, like, a couple of months ago for Jason. It was called FML. It completely bombed. It was a waste of $1 million.

Here we go. 4.6 out of 5 on IMDb. I looked it up yesterday.

IMDb is out of 10.

Oh, I'm sorry. Yeah, that's hilarious. It was like, honestly, it's like 8.1 out of 10. Go look it up, guys. Oh yeah, on IMDb, and it's like 4.6 out of 5.

Okay, I want you to look it up while I tell the story. Jason's gonna show me the actual— no, no, show me, show me. Okay, so basically we were in his movie and it was really funny because we hung out with him and he was old, and it was the whole like dynamic of him being old and us being young. And then fast forward 2 months later, I'm going to a comedy club to watch some friends, and I see Jason performing. And Jason just puts on this hilarious skit where he's basically yelling at the audience and he's telling them that they're stupid millennials. And then I approach him after the show like a producer of some big-budget movie, and I'm like, hey, I want you to do that in front of the big cameras tomorrow at my place on the vlog.

And everybody around me was like, who's that fucking kid?

Little did Jason know that it changed his life. I don't even know.

It would change my life forever. 8.1 out of 10.

Shut up.

Yeah, David, it's a good movie.

No way.

David, it's a good movie. People tweet me all the time. It's a good movie. Just because people haven't seen it.

Just to be fair, it only has 67 votes. So if I vote a 1, it'll probably go down to 6.9.

I did 63 of those votes.

You did 63 of those votes and you were still so honest that you didn't give yourself a 10.

I want to make it look real.

You were like, no, this movie doesn't deserve a 10. Even though all the votes are from you.

David, it's a good movie. I fucking— I stand by it.

No, I mean, I had a good time. I had a good time being in the movie, and it was actually one of my first movies I've ever done.

And definitely your first movie.

Yeah, your last. I don't ever want to do a movie. I don't ever want to be in front of the camera anymore like that.

Really?

Yeah.

Why?

I don't know. I just— I wasn't good at acting. And like, you were—

you're hilarious.

What was impressive about you is how nice you were. To people like on set. Oh, but can I tell you what really pissed me off about the movie?

What?

At the credits, you gave everyone like a big like picture and their name, and then you gave me a tiny name. Like Liza, my girlfriend, who was in it for less time than I was, had like her entire picture and it was like Liza Koshy, and then it was David Dobrik. And that really pissed me off. Don't look, don't look at me like—

Interesting you bring that up. I don't remember that.

Okay. The movie—

maybe you deserve it because you said the movie sucked.

It's the bottom line.

Yeah, so that's why you didn't like it. Oh, the truth comes out. You didn't have a title card. No, that's why you didn't like it. If I had a big title card there, you're like, oh, so good, you gotta see it.

Let me tell you more about Jason. Jason's divorced. Yeah, so he's David. I'm not divorced.

Divorced from reality. David puts scorpions on people.

I just— we actually put scorpions on people today. Jason has two kids. Who both love him very much, surprisingly. Yeah, but I mean, he doesn't love them back. That's the—

that's the difficult part. When David asks my kids to say bad stuff about me in his vlog, they tell him no. They're the only people that tell David no.

That's— yeah, that's so annoying. I want him to say something bad. The other day I had to trick them into saying something bad about you. Yeah, I had to. We were filming a bit and I wanted them to say, I hate him so much. And I had to say, like, 'Hey, what do you guys think about Hitler?' And then like, 'I hate him so much.' And then, and then I voiced it over later and it was like, 'Hey, what do you guys think about your dad?' And they're like, 'I hate him so much.' Did you use that bit? No, I never used it.

You didn't end up using it?

No, but that's how I have to trick your kids into talking crap about you.

The vlogs are really fun. Yeah, I enjoy doing it.

Why did you say that like I was holding a gun up to your head?

People ask me all the time, they're like, 'Why does he It's like my ex-wife said that to me. She's like, oh, it's great. Then she's like, what does David get out of it?

Yeah, it's so funny like that because then people ask me on my end and they'll be like, what do you— what does Jason get out of it? Because I'll be like, do you pay him? Because Jason goes through a lot of torture. If you watch the videos, you know, you know that he bends backwards for these videos.

I bend over backwards for you and it pisses me off after I like do a bit for you. And then you, you're mean to me. I don't like it. Like when you take me to the wall the other night.

What wall?

Oh my God, you're permanently lost it.

When I taped you to the wall? I think you said when I took you to the wall.

How about yesterday when we were like, okay, if who, who would, who would hurt here? David asked a question, uh, he was filming. He's like, okay, if Jason died, who would feel it the most? And then David goes, I would, I would feel it the most. And I was like, oh, that's so sweet. And Dave was like, financially.

Well, yes, I think that was obvious.

I thought it was— I thought it was like, oh, you'd be sad that I was gone.

I said who would be affected by it most, not feel it the most.

Affected feelings.

Yeah, I'd obviously be affected by it the most because you're in my vlogs the most.

And obviously David doesn't believe in any kind of psychology. Like, I've tried to dissect him a million times. Like, his relationship with his parents is so messed up, and, and I'm like, well, what is it? What it's all about? He's like, I just think I like to be on my own.

Like, I never said that.

You didn't say that. But, but you won't dig in any kind of psychological way, whereas I'm more psych. I'm like, I like to get in there.

And Jason loves horoscopes is what he's trying to say. There was one time— I completely hate horoscopes. Let me tell you a story. I think I got this on the vlog once. Liza, my girlfriend, is 100% into horoscopes, and that's all she cares about. And one day I'm like, they're complete bullshit. Like, none of it is like true. And she's like, yeah, right, whatever, read me mine right now. So I read her horoscope, and as I'm listening, and I'm like, you're gonna have a great week because you're very optimistic about the days. And she's like, yep, that's me. And then I read another and it's like, your relationship is very strong right now with your family. And she's like, yep, that's me. And I kept reading off things and she's like, yep, that's me. And I'm like, okay, cool. Well, that wasn't your horoscope. That was someone else's.

You're a regular David Copperfield. You're a regular Penn and Teller debunking things people enjoy.

It's just, dude, horoscopes.

Next on Dobrik, horoscopes. They're not real.

Horoscopes are just so, like, basic. They're like—

I don't like horoscopes. I don't know where you got that from.

You're that kind of a person, though.

I think it's different. No, I think psychology is rooted in something like, you know, your dad's gone when you're a child, you have an empty hole in you. You grow up without parents, you'll have like an empty hole in you, just like you.

Yeah, I don't have an empty hole in me though.

You're soulless.

I think I was, just because of the relationship I had with my parents, I found myself at a very early age. Right?

I get it. I get your relationship with your parents. I didn't get it at first. I was like, "Wow, he's a dick." But now, like, I get it more.

What do you mean? What do you mean? What did you think at first?

And at first I was like, wow, what a little shit. Like, he'll, he'll look back on this and he'll change and he'll have like— I'm sure you will when you get older. You'll be like a little more patient.

They don't know what you're talking about.

They don't?

What's my relationship like with my parents?

According to you, you're like— David's mom and dad will call and they're from another country.

They're from Slovakia, but they live in Illinois. Chill. They've been living there for like 15 years, which is even like harder.

There's like a, there's a barrier there. There's a cultural barrier there. And so David is like always really annoyed when they call and they want to come stay. And he's like, it's not a good time. And they want him to come back for the christening. And he's like, again, I can't come back right now.

And then, you know, the problem with my parents, and they're 100% listening to this, and this is really frustrating, is they're always like, okay, when I used to just stay at home and do nothing, and I would play— I think this is all parents— and I would play video games all day, they'd be like, why don't you ever leave the house? Why don't you do anything productive? And then when I'd be out all day, they'd be like, why don't you just stay in a little bit and stop going out with your friends? That was all the time with my parents. It was on and off. And now I finally have a job and they're like, you're so stressed out, you have to calm down, you have to stop working. When before, when I was at home and I was sitting at nothing, they were like, you need to get a job, you need to start doing something with your life. There's like this weird thing where I can't win with them. And that's like the most frustrating thing.

And you're punishing them now for all those years they fucked with you.

No, not really punishing them. I'm just like, I finally moved out, and I think moving out really, like, helped my relationship with my parents. Like, it was going downhill quick. Like, it was brutal. But then I left, and it was so much better. It was like, "OK, cool. I make my own decisions." You're doing gay shit.

You're recording your friends' dick and stuff.

Yeah, I talk about masturbation and jacking off. This is what I fucking wanted. It's finally here.

David has a $2.7 million house. In the Hollywood Hills.

$2.6 million.

A $2.6 million house in the Hollywood Hills that he bought 2 months ago. And it has been sitting empty for 2 months.

I don't have time to furnish it.

You don't have time to live there or furnish it. Do you know how crazy that is?

Yeah.

That you're sitting on an empty house.

But now when someone asks me and they're like, I don't even know. I think it's an investment. That's what it is. I know it sounds stupid, but I'm glad I spent my money on something where I can make the money back later. As opposed to throwing it out for rent.

How much do you think you're gonna make on it? A couple hundred thousand?

I honestly just want to break even after 5 years. Like, I want to be able to have like that place and just break even. I think that's really cool about homes and stuff, right? Right.

I don't know what— yeah, but like the stress of having it, and I just don't understand why you haven't moved in.

I don't know.

Move in, take a week off from the vlog.

Okay, you know that's not possible, David.

You're at a place where you're successful enough and popular enough that you can take time off and move to a house and have a life.

Exactly. That's exactly what everyone on Vine said, or everyone that like was on MadCon. They were like, okay, we're making so much money, we're good, let's take a break, maybe go buy a car, enjoy ourselves a little bit. It's not like that.

I'm talking about one week where you put some stuff in.

Yeah, but this—

fine, then take the—

it's funny because this is, this is how my parents think too. I'm not pointing at anything. Jason just got scared that there's something behind.

I'm jumpy all the time around David because I think there's a scorpion on my head or cockroaches.

No, no, this is what my parents say too. My parents My parents are always like, they think that once you made a certain amount of money or once you've gotten to some point in your life, this is what I think they think. They're like, take a break, like calm down, like hang out with your family and blah, blah, blah. Like, you know, do all that, do all that stuff. But like, they don't understand that that's like where I think at least people go wrong. It's like, I have such a crazy like opportunity. And if I'm not like constantly running and constantly doing it, then I'm like an idiot. People would kill to be in my shoes. Literally, they'd kill me to be in my shoes.

It's a fucking blessing when you want to shoot.

Yeah, it's— I mean, it's a blessing to have, like— I'm like, I don't like using that word because I think it's lame, but it kind of is. I mean, it is a blessing to be in my shoes. And it's just like crazy that my parents would be like, take a break off, or even you would say take a break. Like, how can I take a break when I have like this amazing thing?

Okay, then just move in. In other words, you think there's nothing to the phrase, like, why have it if you can't enjoy it?

I am enjoying it. I'm enjoying being stressed out. I'm enjoying, like, the feeling of, like, putting out a video every other day or whatever I do is the best feeling, right? That's my enjoying.

I get that. Yeah, but when you taped me to the wall the other night and you were there, you were mean to me after. I didn't like that at all.

Yeah, I know.

Okay, why you gotta be mean to me all the time?

It's for the camera, Jason. It's not.

The cameras weren't even on.

This is what I do to you. I'm mean to you because I want to fire you up for the camera.

That doesn't at all.

Fire me up, because then you get angry when I do turn the camera on.

Fucking sitting at Stout the other night, I'm overweight, I got a big chicken sandwich in front of me. He pulls out his Snapchat, he's like, hey, look at this fat old piece of shit. Yeah, you did the other night. Yeah, you did. You made some kind of old joke. No, I put the Snapchat in my face. I had barbecue sauce, and then Alex was just sitting there like— I know Alex looks at you like, you're a fucking asshole, David.

No, that's not true. I never said that. I never said—

Yeah, you did. You pulled out Snapchat and you made an old joke.

Okay, I made an old joke. I never said you fat piece of shit. Like, what the hell is that? No, I never did.

I think it's old piece of shit.

Let me get back to that. To the whole— what was your— what was your phrase about enjoying it?

Why have it if you can't enjoy it?

Yeah, that's like— that reminds me, like, my life or like life in general reminds me of the game Grand Theft Auto. Do you know what that game is?

Sure.

So basically, you got to complete a bunch of missions to get money and then you can buy cars with stuff. And I played that game for about 2 months and I loved it. I loved every second of it. I loved completing the missions and everything. And then I got to the end and and they basically give you like unlimited money so you can buy whatever you want. And now all you're doing is just cruising around in your Ferrari and your private jets, and that's all you're doing. But you have no more work, right? And that's the worst part of the game because you get bored of it in 3 days.

It's not the destination, it's the journey.

Yes. Damn, now we hitting bullet points.

I had to explain what laryngitis meant to David the other night.

Not what it meant.

I just feel like, what's laryngitis? There's all these words like, you're really smart, but you're so fucking dumb in other ways. Here's what's great about David. David works really hard. He's really good at making videos. And the probably thing I respect most about you is you, you broke the form of a comedy vlog. You did that.

Thanks.

You broke that. Everyone copies your style. Everyone, you know, and, and it's like, I remember when I first met you, you were like, um, You were like, yeah, like, yeah, like, I was like Vine. And then you told me that you watched YouTube like all your life. Yeah, I never watched YouTube.

I even— I watched it so much because I wanted to be a YouTuber when I was younger, playing video games. And one time my mom even— I remember this because I'm like, boom, I got her, but she doesn't know it. She walked into my room and she's like, what are you doing? You've been— you've been in bed all day. And I'm like, and I was watching YouTube videos, and I responded and I told her I'm working. And she was like, she just laughed, and I was like, in my head, I'm like, yes, that's it, that's it. I just, I just stabbed her. She doesn't know it yet, and you knew, but if she remembers this moment, it's gonna hurt later.

I called her the other day.

Yeah, you did call her.

Fun.

Jason, you called her twice, one time to talk to her about me and then the other time just to get to know her because you were flirting with her.

Yeah, she's awesome. She's really nice.

Yeah, no, but both my parents are nice.

She's worried about you.

I would be too.

I want to let you know that, um, I got a DM today from, uh, Marisol7, 12-year-old girl.

Yeah.

And she just wanted to say, uh, she says hi. Okay, she said tell David I say hi.

Thank you.

And I just got a bunch of those I got to get to.

Yeah, I know. We can maybe get them— get to them off this podcast, or maybe we can start a separate podcast called Hellos, and it's just you listing a bunch of people off.

David and I thought it would be funny just to I always tell him when people say that, because people do always say, "Can you tell Liza I say hi? Can you tell David I say hi?" Which is really sweet, not to make fun of a fan.

It is strange, though.

They don't understand the concept, which is by the time I get to David and tell you that you said hi, I didn't take a picture of you. I don't really know you.

I don't know.

It happened at Playlist nonstop.

No, it happens at the mall. It happens with Liza all the time. Everyone will come up to me and be like, "Tell Liza I said hi." And I'm like, okay. 'Will do.' And it's just like, it's so strange.

Curly-haired girl, about 4'5". Yeah, in a Nike sweatshirt.

I think people are— I think people don't do it for me to say hi to Liza. They're doing it, I think, because they want me to acknowledge that I know Liza and I, like, I'm connected to her. Do you know what I mean?

I'm taking it too literally.

I think they— they're, they're doing it like, 'Hey, this is the guy. This is the guy I watch online.' he's friends with Liza. Do you know what I mean? Like, I'm trying to, like, analyze it in a really deep way.

Yeah.

Yeah. Like, they're trying to connect with me in a way where they know that, like, he dates Liza. I know that he knows that if I say, tell him, tell Liza I said hi, he's going to respond with, okay, because that's his life and I know it. Does that make sense?

Yeah, I guess so. So when they say, can you tell David I say hi? I guess I'm being too literal.

No, but it's funny being literal. I totally get that.

So tell people how I'm fake.

How you're fake?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I feel like we should say that for another podcast.

Why?

Because I mean, we can't hit all the eggs now.

Hit all the marks now. Are we talking too fast? I think we are.

We are talking.

We're both really nervous. Yeah, we talked way too fast.

Do we even like completely— yeah, we talked really quick. This is how I talk when I'm acting. I try to get it all out in like 10 seconds because I don't want to be on screen for too long.

Yeah, you don't want the silence to like sink in and actually feel anything.

I exactly I hate silence.

Yeah.

Maybe, yeah, maybe we were talking too fast. Fuck, guys. We're new to this podcast thing. We're gonna be pretty honest with you guys. Why did we start it? Jason needs the money.

I need the money, guys.

Even though I'm taking the bigger percentage out of this.

It's a 95-3 split.

It's a 95-3 split.

But I can't do math, so I think it's right.

When my agency came to me with the split for the percentages, I don't know what it was. What's the split?

70/30.

It's 70/30. Yeah, they came to me. They're like, hey, how do you feel about you getting 70% and Jason getting 30%? I'm like, yeah, I guess let's do it. Like, I didn't even think about it. No, honestly, that's fair. Honestly, I didn't think about it. And I'm like, damn, that sucks.

You think so?

Yeah, because we're doing the same thing. I understand.

Yeah, but you're, you're gonna have people that actually come to listen to you.

I understand that, but like, it just sucks.

All right, well then give me more.

It's something—

it's already in writing, guys.

It's something I've kind of had to live with, like, not live with, but something I've realized working in social media is like some people just have it and some people have to work a little harder. Do you know what I mean?

Yeah, and some people are like really hard.

Liza posts once a week, works incredibly hard on one video, you know what I mean? Yeah, like there's— I'm not taking away from that at all, right? But I mean, she posts one video and it's the equivalent to me posting three. Yeah, and I work equally— I work equally hard on each one. So it's just kind of like— not, not— I don't want to say that Liza has to work less hard, but it's just like, just some people just got it going more. And that's like, yeah, that's like the whole industry. That's how it works. Yeah, some people are just born with it and the others kind of have to figure it out.

Are you looking at me?

Well, I mean, because we're doing a podcast, because we're doing a podcast and there's two of us in this room.

Oh, sorry.

And because we really have to fucking figure it out.

Glad we told everyone the split. Yeah, I'm not gonna go edit that out. I'm too lazy.

Oh, you can edit things out of the podcast?

Yes, we're not going live.

Oh my God, I thought it's just one continuous stream.

Well, yeah, it's just like a video. You just cut it up if you want to cut stuff.

That's why, that's why I was surprised when you said the N-word earlier a couple times. I'm like, how is he going to edit that out?

But so back to the split.

Yeah, back to ourselves.

I'm gonna make any money on this anyway.

Yeah, that's my, my whole hypothesis on this is we're not going to make any money off this podcast. But Jason, Jason's doing anything he, anything he can.

I got to. If you—

Jesus Christ, I'm—

people are finding my number now.

If you—

if it sucks—

if you show up to Jason's house and you ask him to mow your lawn for like $50, he'll be like, okay, but I want to come— my manager in on it.

I won't. I, I, I don't—

Jason will take any job at this point. Yeah, even though he's making good money off YouTube, which doesn't—

I make $4,000 a month. Do you think that's good money?

People listening to you right now are like, yeah, off YouTube videos.

They don't live in Los Angeles and have 2 kids and an ex-wife.

You're right, you're right.

But you make a really sweet Ford Explorer in the driveway.

You make— let's be honest, you make $5,000 a month off YouTube.

I make—

and not only that, but you get brand deals.

Yeah, but they don't pay me. They're like net 90, bitch.

Yeah, you gotta wait a little bit to get paid. But at some point they're just going to keep coming in because you've waited so long for each of them.

They dry. I don't get that many brand deals. You know why I don't get any brand deals? You get a lot of them. No, I don't. You know why I don't get them anymore? Why? Because of your stupid vlog where I dress as a Mexican prostitute, as a Guatemalan prostitute.

Guadalajara.

And do jokes like this bomb-ass pussy. We were in the airport the other night. First of all, it really, really bummed me out when we were driving to the airport and you were like, Why are you— why do you— why are you coming with me to Chuck Norris's house?

Well, yeah, because I just didn't get it. Like, I didn't get your angle. It's like when your wife asked why you vlog with me, I was like, dude, this is gonna be hell. Why are you coming?

You invited me.

No, and I love that I asked, but like, I'm like, I wanted to make sure that you wanted to come because it was— I knew it was going to be awful and it was going to be a lot of work.

It was a lot of work for me. We went to Chuck Norris's house, by the way. Yeah, we got a big, big brand deal.

Chuck is—

and do you get paid nice for that?

I think I got paid nicely.

Yeah, like, like real nice.

Like, not just—

don't, don't be like, what I deserve. I'll show you what you deserved is not really what—

I'll show you how much on my hand, but I don't think you can say it out loud. Yeah, it's pretty good.

That's fucking great. And you bitched about it.

I didn't bitch about it.

I know, in your defense, in your defense, you were upset that it was taking away from the vlog, which is the only reason. Think about David, he does not He does— the only time he complains is when someone's fucking with his vlog. He's not a complainer. He doesn't think he's worth more than he is, although that is an insane number. It's— that's a really good number.

Yeah, it's a lot.

It's a really good number. People are dying to know what it was.

Oh, I'm 100% gonna talk about it. I just— like, like, like I said before, I don't want to start talking about everything now. I'm 100% gonna bring up how much I make, how much we make on everything later. Like, I think that's the most interesting thing, and I think people deserve to know.

Yeah.

When I was growing up, all I would do— because I watched a lot of YouTube— all I would do was guesstimate, like, how much these YouTubers are making. And I'd see the cars they're buying, and I'm like, what are they— like, what could they possibly be making? Yeah, I was— I can tell you guys this. I was on a panel for Vine the other day, and I asked the audience, I'm like, how much do you think the big Viners made on Vines? And one girl goes, $500 for like a sponsored Vine. And I go, I go, are you sure? Why do you think that? And she goes, well, because they're 6-second videos. And I'm like, cool. And then I told her the actual answer, which— are you guys ready? For like a big Viner, so like, you know, people with over 7 million followers, for one sponsored Vine would most likely get anywhere between $40,000 to $100,000.

That's the really top, top, top.

Yes, but this is for a 6-second video, dog.

That's the top, top, top. It's not that much. I didn't get that much.

You didn't? You weren't at the top at all. Yeah, but I were at 1.

You're at 1 million, between 1 and 2.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I've heard, I've heard about brand deals. I've heard one guy, I don't want to say his name, but for like 3 or 4 Vines, it was like a big campaign, he made $300,000. Really ridiculous. And like, this girl thought— this girl thought a playlist—

yeah, I saw that. I was there in the back watching you.

That it was $500.

Yeah, you were good on the panel.

I didn't get to talk. I love talking a lot.

Eric Dunn was hogging the mic.

No, no one was really hogging.

No, no, I love Eric Dunn.

Eric Dunn's one of my favorites.

He's one of my favorites. Yeah, I love Eric Dunn because he's like original. He's very original at what he did.

No, I like that kind of— I still feel like we're talking too fast for some reason. Liza's FaceTiming me. Should I get her on the podcast?

Yeah.

Well, this is great. This is—

why not?

Can we use this as clickbait? Liza, Liza, we're recording our podcast right now.

Put the mic up to her voice.

Oh boy. Okay, okay. Have fun, boys. You're on our podcast. Do you want to say something?

Oh my God, is it live?

Well, it's not live, but I don't think we can edit it out. So say something that'll get us views because the podcast is titled Views.

I love you so much and you're the sweetest thing that's ever happened to me. Jason. Okay, okay, hanging up now.

All right, bye.

She got a thing for me.

I think she was drunk.

I don't know, man. It's like the way she looks at me sometimes.

You think she looks at you different?

Just, you know, I don't know, sometimes, you know, it's like—

Liza, my girlfriend? Yeah, I've seen you try to pull moves on my girlfriend.

Yeah, it's like, it's like a, you know, that thing where you're like, you know what each other are thinking. Yeah, like all the time.

You look at Liza and you just know that she's thinking about you.

Like the other day, she was like, can you pass the— and I go, salt? And she goes, yeah.

Yeah, I was there for that.

Weird.

I felt really threatened when that was happening.

Weird.

Yeah.

And you know, it's like this thing where just we have a special chemistry.

Is this an ASMR video? Today I'm gonna be unboxing my peanut butter.

I'm going to— I know I'm going to take the break.

You know what I feel? What's wrong with this podcast is we don't have any structure. We kind of just went at it.

This is what people love. Really? Yeah. I did a podcast. I had the first podcast.

Do you think we're doing good so far?

Oh my God, it's really good.

Are you serious? I swear to God, people listening to this are going to be like, is this guy nuts?

No, no, no, no. People, this is so good.

I feel like there's no structure behind this and we're kind of just talking out of our ass and we're changing the subject every 5 minutes.

It keeps people interested.

I guess. Let's talk about bamboo.

We're getting a lot in. We're fitting a lot into the first episode.

Okay, fuck bamboo. Never mind.

I'll talk about bamboo.

No, forget it.

I used to go to a Chinese restaurant called Bamboo.

You like Chinese food? Can I tell you guys something? We drive by this Chinese place every other day, and a sushi place, sorry. And for 5 different times, Jason would go, hey, you know what, that sushi place is great. And he didn't realize that he kept saying it every day. Until I told him, and he hasn't said it since. But he would say it every time we drove by.

Here's another weird thing about David. He drives people home.

I love driving people home.

You drive people home.

That's why I have an SUV.

I would never, ever drive people home. No, I would hate it.

It's like, it's my relaxing time being in the car.

I always feel guilty. I'm like, no, no, I'll call an Uber. But then like, obviously I want to be driven home.

That's funny because that's how Liza and I would get into literal, like, literal fights and arguments about this when she would land at the airport.

Yeah.

And I'd be like, I'm gonna pick you up. And she's like, no, no, it's okay, I'll just get an Uber. And I'm like, Liza, I'm gonna pick you up. And she's like, no, babe, it's fine. And she thinks she's doing me like a favor, right? And she'll call an Uber and I would be like, are you kidding me? Yeah, I'd get so mad.

That's interesting. It's nice. It's nice to pick a girlfriend up at the airport too, though. It's like super nice.

And it's just like, I don't know, like, if I haven't seen her, I kind of just like want to pick her up. And like, the drive home is always the best It's like, yeah, talk about everything, and then when you get back home, it's busy stuff again, so you don't get to see each other that much, right? Yeah.

Yeah, you guys have— you guys have an interesting relationship.

Yeah, Liza's a busy bee.

It's a good one. You guys are always— I'm very impressed with your relationship.

You always have no hope in it.

It's not in your relationship, it's in everyone's.

I guess you're right.

You're fine. You guys are great. I mean, I'm very impressed with how much, you know, you share You know, she does her thing and you do your thing and you call her and you check in with her and, uh, and it's very quick phone calls, very quick. Hey babe, how are you? What's up? Checking in, editing, can you come? It's always— this is always a conversation. Oh babe, can you come? I can't, I can't, I'm editing. That's it. Yeah, that's the— that's the relationship. But she's busy.

Yeah, that's back.

She's gonna be like Oprah.

She's gonna be like Oprah.

Mother God, what if she was president?

Why is the president— I feel like that's not what she wants to do, actually.

Well, she had like an acting career too young, and then she became president. She won't.

I don't, I don't think— I feel like it's too early to tell if she wants to be president, but I'm 100% sure she probably would be able to do it.

So sick. I think it's interesting how you started vlogging, you were the only one doing it, and Tell that story. Tell the story when time when you were the only one doing it, 'cause you love, David always says to me, he's like, "It was so great. It was so great when I was the only one vlogging." Oh my God, yeah.

Well, I started—

Is it that hard now that everybody else vlogs? You seem to be doing very well.

Well, 'cause I've adjusted. But let me tell you something. So basically I started vlogging when I met Liza at VidCon, I think it was. And I was driving her to the airport, which I love doing. And she had a camera. And this is going to sound narcissistic, is because it is. And this is the first time I've seen like a flip-up camera that was like handheld. And I just put it on me and there was something cool that I liked about seeing myself and just like being able to record myself. I'm like, this is awesome. And everyone before this was always telling me to get on YouTube, like it's the next move. I'm like, I don't need it. I've always told myself, I'm like, wherever I'm gonna be, I'm gonna be fine. And like Zane and all them, they all tried doing YouTube and they all have given up because they just couldn't do it. And that's what I think worked about my vlog is I didn't do it because I had to. I just did it because I wanted to, right? And then I started vlogging and I just enjoyed it and I put it together and it was so nice because no one was vlogging and no one was vlogging. So every joke that came up in our friend group was mine.

You snagged it.

Everything was mine. Like, I, I mean, it was the best Monopoly ever. Yeah, it's like Tesla right now. It's like there's no other electric company that can compete with it right now, but 5 years down the road, 10 years down the Every car company is going to be doing electric.

You could just cherry-pick anything funny that happened at the Denny house. It was all endless from Scott.

And it was like if Zane had an idea or someone, because, because my vlogging was helping them grow their socials. So if Zane or Scott had a funny idea, they'd come to me and they'd be like, yo, I have this great idea. Can we do it for your vlog? I'm like, that's hilarious. Let's do it. And it was never for like, yeah, golden time. It was gold. It was, it was amazing. And then, and then I think Scott first started vlogging and and he kinda did it as a prank, like, just to trick me.

Right.

And then Zane did it the next day, and I thought they were kidding. And then they just started doing it, and I'm like, "Man, this is bad. This is gonna..." 'Cause my main concern with them starting vlogging is my storyline's gonna be messed up, 'cause now it's not like, "OK, we're only following these guys this time." Yeah. Now you can tune into Zane's, and something completely different is happening than where you left off before.

Yeah.

And it doesn't follow a certain pattern. And that's what stressed me out the most. I was like, great, now that Zane has a vlog, Zane's gonna be doing something else other than what he was doing in my last vlog, you know? So there's no— like, the storyline couldn't be continued the way I would want it to. Yeah, but then I adjusted to it, and like, I wasn't paying anyone, so that was— they 100% had to do it because there was nothing else they could do.

Yeah, they would have to get jobs, and then you wouldn't be able to shoot with them. Yeah, I love it. I, I love doing it.

Yeah, but now we've— now we've adjusted to it. It's a lot of work now. Now it's No, it's literally a lot of vlogging. It's—

yeah, but you, you're too, you're too hard on yourself. Like, you're insane. You're mental. I think you need to go see a doctor.

Yeah, I think about it too much, which I think is my problem.

Like, you had a— we were in Houston the other night. He hadn't posted. He was with Chuck Norris all day, and I was with Chuck Norris all day. And then we're getting— we're boarding the flight to Houston, and he has to— you have to upload it. It's your last chance. He's standing at the gate uploading it while the gate is closing. The vlog was great. You're like, it's not good.

And I told you it was great because I spent so much time on it. I was just so stressed out.

Yeah, but I told you it was great. And then the next day other people told you it was great and you were like, I told you.

Cool. Well, enough talking about my vlog because I feel like that gets overwhelming. But yeah, no, I have fun doing it. It's stressful and I love it because it's stressful.

Hey, um, I just want to let you know I just got another DM.

I don't want to hear it, Sarah. You're wasting the people's time, Sarah. Listen to this, Jason.

Sarah, Sarah Rubios.

Oh, did she really? She said something.

She said— let me see what she said. She says, tell David I said hi.

Oh, tell her I said hi.

Okay, hang on, let me type it back to her. She says—

it's like to have an intermission every 5 minutes because you get a new DM. How long do podcasts go for?

Well, I mean, look, this was a great one. If we stopped right now, I would call this an A+.

How long do podcasts go for though?

An hour, half hour? I mean, it's up to us.

I like 20 minutes.

Well, we should have stopped 15 minutes ago.

Well, I thought you're gonna cut it together.

No, I think all of it's good.

You're just gonna bottle it up like this and just send it off?

It's awesome.

Well, what's our outro for the podcast? What do we do?

Well, I've written a song here. I'll take a look at it here. Grab your sides here.

Okay.

All right, and just sing it in the— sing it. It's a parody song.

Yes.

Sing it to Taylor Swift's Bad Blood. Cool. Here we go.

Just so you guys know, we have nothing in front of us.

Well, baby, David is my blood.

Thank you for watching. Listening.

Huh? It says listening.

Listening. Oh my God, I'm such an idiot. I already messed it up.

Well, David is my blood because he's a good friend of mine.

Okay, that's it guys. Thank you guys for listening. We'll see you guys during our next podcast.

I worked hard on this.

You have nothing in front of us.

It was supposed to be an improvisation.

Thank you for listening. Make sure you follow us on our social medias.

I'm @JasonNash and Jason22Nash on TikTok.

Who cares? Who cares? I'm David Dobrik.

I'm Jason Nash. I'm on YouTube. I really need this.

All right, thank you guys. Bye.