Students Making Out with Their Own Parents

What's up guys, welcome back to Views. Um, before we start, I want to give a quick moment of silence to Jason's mom passing away.

Um, not today, David.

Oh no, it's Jason's mom! Roll the intro. So guys, you heard it here correctly, I'm here with Lorraine Nash and her beautiful son Jason Nash. That just came. They flew in all the way from Boston to be here for the special moment. You want to say— you want to introduce yourself, Mrs. Nash?

Hi everybody, it's me.

But go ahead and go ahead, say something about yourself. How old are you? Describe how you look.

Oh, okay. Um, I'm 73. I'm going to be 74 next month, February 15th.

So you had Jason when you were like 70, or when you were like 4, you had Jason? You had Jason at a very young age.

Actually, I was 30.

You were— you You were 30. Oh yeah, that makes sense.

Do the math, David. What are you, dumb?

I'm just trying to bust your balls, okay?

You must be a dummy. You can't do math? 73 minus 44.

Okay, you're from Boston, right? And you, you are— are you single or are you taken?

I'm single.

Oh, Jason, don't let me do this by myself. Get in the podcast.

Uh, and she loves— she loves, um, she, she lives by herself. She lives in a really nice town.

She lives by herself.

Yeah. And she's got a— she, she was working up until a couple years ago, but now she doesn't work. She was working at— last job she was at Neiman Marcus at the restaurant. She was a hostess.

And you're retired now, correct?

Right. I was doing that part-time.

How do you like being retired?

I love it.

You do?

Oh, I love it. Yeah, it's great. You get to do all the things that you always wanted to do and never had time to do.

Don't you find yourself just sitting around though?

No, I don't. Honestly, I don't know how I had the time to work. No, I'm serious. Like, I just never ever thought that I— I did think that I would be bored. But now I think back and I'm like, when did I have time to work?

Do you miss being younger? Do you miss having like—

Yeah, well, of course you do. You miss the youthfulness.

Well, yeah, I mean, I miss that.

Yeah, of course.

I can relate to that.

You miss the youthfulness.

Do you drink at all? Do you do drugs?

I drink wine, but not a lot.

You hardly ever drink.

A couple times a week.

You don't know her, Jason. She's a different woman.

No, maybe like a glass of wine when I go out. Dinner with my friends. I do have one.

And do you stay up late at night thinking that David's gonna kill me? Accidentally?

On purpose?

Well, I do worry about certain things since you've met David.

Are you happy with our relationship? What do you think about me and Jason?

I love it.

Yeah?

Yeah, I think you're good for each other.

What do you honestly say about me behind my back?

The truth.

Which is? That's not a good answer.

The truth, which I think you're good for each other. I think both of you bring something to the table that's different, that's necessary.

Yeah, awesome. Yeah, do you listen?

I think you're really good for each other.

Do you listen to the podcast?

Yeah, I do.

Really?

Yeah.

Awesome. And do you, um, do you enjoy it?

Yes, of course.

That's amazing.

I wouldn't listen if I didn't enjoy it.

She talks about you a lot, about, uh, like tonight, for example. She's always thinking about you. It's really funny.

No, she's— it's really sweet. Like, last night we hung out And we were vlogging, so I was making a bunch of jokes about her dying. And then Brandon says something about me. I don't know, he says something mean about me. And all of a sudden she goes, leave him alone, or something like that, like defending me. And I'm even like, listen, I just made like 50 jokes about you passing away tomorrow. So you have to give me a—

Yeah, but I don't take that personal.

No, I know. You're so awesome about the jokes.

One of the things like— I try to take like a lot of courses now because the thing that scares me the most about retiring is not growing and learning and being productive. Like, I would just— just kill me now. Shoot me right now.

Seriously?

Seriously.

Literally. Let me grab an SD card.

Let me grab my camera.

If I can't continue to grow and learn, so I take all these courses.

No, that's amazing.

And I'm taking a course in mindfulness, which Teaches you to be in the moment and not be judgmental of yourself or anybody else. And do you know how hard that is?

Oh, wait a minute. Maybe someone over there could take that kind of class. Where can someone sign up for that?

Ooh, it's just us three in the room.

Do they have that in LA?

Who could you be talking about? I heard you also do yoga, which is amazing.

I do yoga. Yeah, twice a week I do yoga.

They have a class in my mom's complex. It's called a laughing class. And the old people are so depressed that there's a woman that comes in and just starts making them laugh.

Bullshit. Is that true?

With all the jokes, yeah.

She's raising her arm to tell me that she's being honest. It's like, what does she do? What kind of joke does she tell?

I don't know, I haven't gone yet, but I signed up, so I'm going this week.

Oh, it's called laughing class.

Yeah. No, but there are—

It's to teach you how to enjoy life again? Wow.

Well, I guess, I mean, I'm not depressed, but I guess as you get older, one of the things that happens is you get depressed.

Is that true?

If you're not busy enough, you have to stay busy. Shit.

How much fun is it to come out here and, you know, do videos? Are you having a blast?

Yeah, the best.

You're the best.

So much fun.

You're the best with the videos too. I mean, like, seriously, like, you took our directions. Like, the other day you came out and you were like, "Where's my fucking milk?" in my vlog, and it was hysterical. People really love you. I mean, it's— And you're the best to scare because you always get scared.

Is that a compliment?

Yes, it is. Thank you.

No problem.

I guess I'll take it as a compliment, right?

What do you think? You get so scared.

It is the most amazing thing. No, but how do you feel about Jason? Jason moved out here, what, how many years ago did Jason move out here? 20 years ago.

Yeah, when he first moved out, he started out in New York. New York was great because I could just go down for the weekend.

He was working at SNL, right?

Yeah.

That's awesome.

He was at SNL and I used to—

She goes, "No." I go, "Holy shit, he's been lying to me." How long did he work at SNL for?

6 years?

No, no, no. I was only there for like 2 years.

2 years?

Yeah. Yeah, 'cause I left 'cause I got a job at MTV.

Jason does this amazing thing.

But then there was a year that you were in college, your senior year too, so.

Yeah.

Can you verify that—

I went to the cast parties, it was fun.

Oh, you went to cast parties and stuff? Can you verify this for me? Jason tells me, like, when I bring up, like, celebrities like Amy Poehler or Will Ferrell, he'll be like, oh yeah, yeah, I know Amy. I know Will. Is this something that he's just, like, telling me because he knows I'll never find out if I know them or not? Or, like—

Well, he worked with all of them. I think he knows them.

I was at SNL when all those guys were there. And I knew Amy from—

From UCB, she was a teacher.

From UCB, yeah. She wasn't at SNL then.

So you're saying, like, you and Will Ferrell, Like, oh yeah, I see Will Ferrell.

I know Will Ferrell. He's taken me by his house and everything.

Did you guys just sit outside the house?

There is one time you and Marnie vacationed in Hawaii with him and his wife.

Oh yeah, we went on— yeah, we went to the same wedding.

You vacationed with Will Ferrell?

Yeah, Will and his wife. Yeah. Okay, and we went to a wedding.

Oh, okay.

But we hung out with him all week.

He was just on the other side of the island. Will Ferrell and I were in Hawaii at the same time. Who knew? Almost had the same flight too.

Which celebrities do you know? I don't know OK, well, sounds like someone's jealous.

I am jealous. I think that's awesome. Will Ferrell's amazing, and Amy Poehler.

Yeah.

I just don't know whether or not to believe you.

What was that celebrity that we ran into that didn't know me that I said I knew?

Oh, yeah, we ran into Jimmy Kimmel. Yeah, I remember.

All-time favorite.

Yeah, it was great.

He's amazing.

We ran into him, and Jason's like, don't worry, I got this. I know him.

The truth is, I know he has seen him before. No, but listen, they have been at parties together and he was— they were at the Emmys together. There was him and Conan O'Brien all in this circle talking.

I was at the Golden Globes with Matt Damon, but he doesn't remember me. No, it's, um, it's like I went up to him and Jason's like, hey, it's Jason. And Jimmy's like, uh, Jimmy's just like thinking. He doesn't know who Jason is. And then, and then like, like out of a movie, he points to me and he's like, I think I've seen you somewhere.

Yeah, you recognize David and not me.

And I, I thought that was the funniest thing. Um, no, but Jimmy was awesome. That was like my He's really nice. No, but how are you? How are things?

Yeah, really good.

We were just talking about— we were talking— I was talking to you about the Me Too thing, right? The whole woman initiative to like, you know, right? The whole movement of women in the workplace.

Time's Up.

Well, Time's Up is also like time's up for men, and it's like it's time for women to have equal pay and equal treatment.

Yeah, it's all in the same venue.

Yeah. How do you feel about all that?

I'm happy.

Yeah.

You know, I'm glad that, like Charlie, my granddaughter is not gonna have to go through a lot of the stuff that women did. And it's not just in the entertainment business, it's everywhere.

Yeah.

You know, it's just everywhere.

And how bad was it before, when you were growing up? Like, was it, I don't know.

I was kind of lucky 'cause I got married young.

Yeah.

So, you know.

But you had a job, you had a serious job. You must have faced it in the workplace.

Yeah, I did, but, well, I was in cosmetics, which is a woman's industry.

Yeah.

So, you know, I think I had it probably easier than being working in a men's industry where I worked in an office with a lot of men. But harassment was definitely there. I mean, but, you know, I think, like, I'm all for the change, and I think it's really, really important. But in my era, it was the MO. That's the way everybody was.

It was the norm.

It was normal, you know? And women didn't say anything about it because they didn't think they had a chance to change it.

Yeah.

It was just normal. So when something's normal, you just accept it. And then one day, you know, somebody decides to, you know, stick up for the little guy. Stick. Yeah. And, you know, yeah.

Okay. I, I have a, I have a question though. Um, Jason and I were just talking about this, how much he spoils his children.

And I mean, obviously I can't say anything because it's not really my responsibility, but, but I will say it on a podcast that's downloaded by half a million people.

But I'm gonna say it. Well, where does he get that from? Did you spoil him as a kid?

No, I didn't.

But you did.

I don't think I did spoil him, except—

OK, I was editing the other day, and I couldn't stop overhearing, but Wyatt was asking you for something. He wanted you to buy him something for $1,000.

What was it? No, it was a $10,000 zipline.

It was a $10,000 zipline.

Yeah, a zipline.

$10,000?

Well, he wanted the big one.

And let me guess, it's in your backyard now. Jason already got it shipped in.

No, but Jason, Jason, you know, but I don't, I don't think he's the problem. I think I'm the problem. I think all kids ask for stuff.

It's a problem.

Yeah, yeah.

No, this is—

I wish we were— we didn't— we were poor growing up, so the idea that I can buy my kid an Apple Watch or my kid's happiness so I can, you know, because I'm never around— I'm with you all the time. Let me buy the kid an Apple Watch, for God's sake.

That's what I'm saying.

Why don't you buy me an Apple Watch?

Oh, you can buy plenty of Apple Watches with the money you made off of the lip tattoo I got and the injections I got in my face, you can buy plenty.

No, no, no, no, I'm not, I'm not like hating on it because I know I'm probably going to do that as a dad too. But it's just, I know that if my parents were talking to me, they'd be like, dude, you can't, you can't do this to your kid. You got to, you got to discipline him more. I'm just being the bad guy.

Do you think your parents would say that to me if we were actually had a conversation about it? They'd be like, you're spoiling—

it's none of their business.

No, but it isn't about disciplining. It's about finding a way to give them everything they want and not have them be spoiled and have them be appreciative of everything they have.

So smaller supply.

So it's not so much, yeah, it's not so much, I mean, I think Wyatt and Charlie are very appreciative for what they have. They're not spoiled. They know about other kids that don't have those things.

But I also make videos with them, and so to incentivize them, I'm like, when he gets an apple wash, I'm like, that's for— that's for that Brandale you sweated out that Sunday in the park with, you know, that drone that wouldn't fly.

Totally.

But then on the other hand, it makes sense, you work with kids. So, so yeah, I think it's really important kids shouldn't be spoiled. Can I tell you something appreciative of what they have?

Can I tell you something? Yeah, no, it is. But can I tell you something that'll knock your socks off? Wyatt still believes in Santa Claus.

What's wrong with that? I do too.

Do you— we— oh, we— we— Jason and I were actually having a conversation along the lines of this, is when, when is his son gonna be— when is Jason's son gonna be too old to call him Daddy anymore?

I stopped today.

What?

I stopped today. I made an Instagram post this morning, and I— because it's his birthday today, and I just said, love, Dad. That was it. I ended it.

Oh, what? But did you tell him that he can't call you Daddy anymore?

No, no, I'm just setting the tone, you know. That's it.

Listen, I called my father Daddy till the day he died.

But it's different. It's different for a boy. It's different with a girl and a dad. Yeah, I think that's normal.

Yeah, I thought about that.

Maybe you like—

you like how involved David is in my parenting? Like he's ever raised anything?

But like, here's the thing, Jason, they're sharing one mic too.

It's so funny.

In David's defense, You do say things— you don't say no at times.

She goes, in David's defense, you are a bad father.

David just nailed the Boston accent for the first time. He finally got it.

No, there are times when you should say no.

I know. No, I think—

Like if you're exhausted and it's 9 o'clock at night and it's a school night and they want ice cream. I'm giving it to McConnell.

David couldn't believe that we had that big party yesterday, and then we also took him out tonight.

They had a birthday party yesterday for their son, and then today I'm like, hey Jason, you want to shoot? And he's like, I can't, we're celebrating my son's birthday at 5. I'm like, what happened yesterday? And Jason's like, I know, I know, this is the one thing I'm agreeing with you on.

So wait a minute, it sounds like someone's jealous.

So in David's defense, Well, there we go. I've been trying to think of a way, because even Susie has said to me, no is just not in Jason's vocabulary. She said, you know, Jason is so good. No is just not in his vocabulary. And I tell him he needs to, I tell him he needs to say no once in a while. It's good. So in that light, what I can tell you, and I've been trying to think of a way to tell you this. All I can say is you are not being a good role model for Wyatt because you're not teaching him to ever say no to his kids. Think about it.

You can't see, but Jason's tearing up right now.

How am I— no, how am I— how are you— like, I've been trying to think of a way for you to get it. Like, you could just say it.

You don't have to talk to me with kid gloves. I get it.

Oh, to be fair, I only give you crap because I, like, I don't care personally that you spoil him, but I know that, like, that a lot of people would give you crap, so I give you crap. You know what I mean? I'm like, if a person doesn't—

But it's not about spoiling something. It's about his appreciation of what he's getting.

Yeah, 100%.

You know what I mean?

I agree with that.

I have seen kids that have less than him and they're spoiled brats. And they're disrespectful, and they, I mean, I wouldn't wanna be around them for 5 minutes. Wyatt, even if he weren't my grandson, he is fun.

Yeah, he's great.

He's fun, he's great to be with.

Let's, just for the people at home, 'cause I'm gonna get a lot of tweets, let's see, we're talking about the Apple Watch, and the iPhone X. Those two things.

iPhone X.

The X, which was not that much more a month.

It's not the big things, it's the little things.

Okay, what else?

Can we get CPK delivered? Then can we go get ice cream? Then can we get more candy?

Think of yourself, not the material things. It's what you give of yourself, what you tax yourself on.

But CPK is easier than sitting here making pasta while Zane's editing next to us.

You know what? You know what's tougher? Real love. But maybe you should learn that because your kids need it right now. They have two divorced parents. It's not the easiest for them.

I have to say—

No, no, let me finish. I have— No, no, I'm kidding. Okay, what were you saying?

I have to say that Marnie, um, Wyatt and Charlie's mother, and Jason are doing an excellent job on the way that they've handled the fact that you know, they've separated because—

Oh, blows my mind every day.

To me, he can't fathom it.

He can't fathom that we're like in the same room.

I know, I know. You're that— you're like that with your— with your— with your ex, with your Bob.

Like, we— like, like, we are literally best friends.

Yeah.

How do you— how would you love someone so dearly that you've lived with them and you've had children with them, and then all of a sudden you can't be their friends?

You're right.

All of a sudden you hate them. I hate him. I'm gonna make his life miserable. I'm gonna take away all his money.

I'm gonna take I'm gonna make sure he doesn't have a pot.

That sounds like me talking about Jason behind Jason's back.

I mean, it's so vindictive.

No, you're right. You're 100% right.

You know what I mean? Like, I'm gonna take away— he's not gonna have a pot when I get through with him. I'll fix him.

Why don't we turn— let's turn the tables on David and talk about all his inadequacies.

Yeah, yeah, talk about—

why don't you have a good relationship with your parents?

Oh, what the fuck?

No, don't do that to him. Why?

Look at her, she's defending me.

No, no, don't do that to David. He's gotta post again on Wednesday. He can't get into that now. No, no, no.

No, I have a— my relationship with my parents is getting better. And they listen to my stuff.

And it will as you get older.

Yeah, no, I tell them that all the time. I'm like, guys, it's fine. We're good. And I was literally such a snobby teenager that I just didn't give anybody a chance.

And I also think that hanging out with Jason is, you know, it's kind of like a life lesson for you on what you want to do and what you don't want to do when you're his age.

Well, a lot of what I don't want to do. It's definitely—

That's OK.

It's definitely a big lesson on what wasn't in your life.

You wouldn't even be thinking about a lot of this stuff.

That's true, you know.

Hold on, I gotta— I just crafting an email to Wyatt. Never fucking call me again.

Build your own zipline, bitch. We're gonna have to— we're gonna have to stop you right there, Mrs. Nash, because we got to read a bunch of ads and we don't want you here for the heat. That we're about to produce, 'cause it's— Jason, when me and you read ads, it's—

It's something special. Something comes together. It's very cosmic.

It's like when a planet is built.

It's really great.

It's fucking— It's an explosion of ideas.

I can hear the money truck being backed up to David's house right now.

Yeah, but guys, round of applause at home for Mrs. Nash for coming on the show.

I love you, Mom.

Yeah, I love you both very much.

Thank you.

Thank you for coming.

Who do you like more, me or Jason?

Equal.

You know what?

Equal?

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Yeah, tweet us your new website. We're down to check it out. I have a fun fact for everybody.

Oh sure, go ahead.

I am a father, and I took your advice. I told my kids to fuck off.

Did you?

Yeah.

That was terrible.

I said I'm going to be getting drunk every day. You're not buying you shit anymore. Good, David said.

What did your kids say?

They cried for a while. They said they never want to see you or I again.

But did it feel good?

It felt great.

It's amazing.

It felt great. It was really liberating. And I now no longer call myself a father or a dad or anything. I don't have anything like that. We just worry about—

we just got back from a fashion show, like a serious, like, walkway type thing.

David had a whole night of his designs that were out there. Clickbait. Yes, Fanjoy merch.

Fanjoy merch. It was just— no, it was my first time at like a walkway thing where people were like showing off.

Runway.

Runway. Runway.

What'd you think?

It was nuts.

You were fascinated.

I was.

You were like, this is a thing.

Mind blown. These people, like these very serious looking, like elegant people walking down a runway. It lasted about 9 minutes.

Yeah, it was so quick. And, and Which, by the way, I don't know, people are probably like, why are they going to fashion shows? And we, we just have a friend that invites us to stuff.

Oh yeah.

And because we vlog, yeah, we, we, we deem any opportunity to go to something as maybe a possibility that we'll get content, even though we didn't.

Yeah.

So we never do.

We went to this fashion show, it was 9, we sat down, there was like drinks before, it was at the Roosevelt, it was at the rooftop of the Roosevelt, which I can't imagine is cheap to rent out for a night.

Oh no, so penthouse.

It's at the— yeah, it was at the penthouse of the Roosevelt. We get there, there's cocktails, there's all sorts of things being served. And then they're like, okay guys, get seated. We sit down, spotlights turn on, music starts playing, cool like French music or something. And then just like a bunch of sexy people walk down the runway, like looking fucking fierce as hell. And it lasts about literally like 8 to 9 minutes, and then it's over. And then the people that designed the clothes come out, they bow, and then everyone goes home. And I was so— I was just so mind-blown that like, I imagine so much went into that, like so much work went into it, but it was only—

it was— we saw Heidi Klum.

It was Heidi Klum. It was only 8 minutes long, the whole thing. Yeah, that's—

which is actually great because most things in life are too long. You're right, right? Movies are too long.

Concerts, honestly, when it was over, I don't give, uh, like I don't give a fuck about fashion obviously, but I fucking loved it.

It was great because I really did—

quickly it ended quick and I was I was so fucking confused. I was so obsessed with it. And I didn't— I don't care for what people are wearing because I have no taste. But when I saw it, I was mind-blown. Just like the fact that these people are so like serious walking. I don't know, it felt like I was on another planet and I was watching people do their thing. I don't know, it was very mesmerizing. I appreciated the whole thing a lot.

I was sitting there thinking, I'm so hungry.

Thanks. Um, that's amazing.

The entire time.

Uh, last night we went to go get our friend Jonah's ears pierced, and we got his nipples pierced, and we got his belly button pierced at the same time.

His family's angry with us.

His family's not happy with us.

What did Jonah say?

It was— this is— this is honestly— this was Jonah's idea. Jonah was like, dude, my mom hates piercings, because Jonah's Armenian, so he His parents hate anything that's like out there. Yeah. So he's like, hey man, my parents hate piercings, let's get my ears pierced. So we got to the piercing place and then we decided, hey, it'll be so much funnier if we do the belly button. And then 10 minutes later we decided it'll be so much funnier if we do the nipples too. So we got everything pierced. This is what happened. So last night we have all the piercings and we get to the house and we show, bottom line, we show his mom the piercings, the ear piercings first. And he told us, he warned us too. Yeah, he's like, dude, I'm telling you, my mom's gonna flip. My mom's gonna fucking flip.

And over and over again.

And we showed his mom because we were so scared of his dad. We had his dad wait in the living room because we didn't want him— like, we didn't want him there because we were scared he's gonna fucking beat us if he saw these ear piercings. And yeah, his mom's just like— his mom was mad at first, and I'm like, okay, maybe she's playing it up for the camera. And then the little brother Vardhan started crying. And I didn't even put this in my vlog because I even turned my camera off and I'm like, "Vardan, why are you crying?" And he thought that we were never going to be able to be invited over again.

And he might be right.

And he may be right because he was like, he was like, yeah, he was, he was, he was crying. And then his mom started crying because Vardan was crying. So it was a mess. But then, I mean, we made a couple jokes and then we were all laughing about it. And then I had to go. And then I even asked Jason, I asked Josh, and I asked Joan, I'm like, "Dude, should we show them the rest of the piercings?" And they're like, "Yeah, we gotta do it. We gotta do it." I'm like, "Okay, yeah, you're right. We have to fucking— we have to see this through." So we're all cheerful. We're happy, whatever. So I have Jonah take off his shirt, and he has his nipples pierced and his belly button pierced. And his mom just looks at me— or sorry, looks at Jonah just completely like blank-faced, just like in disbelief. And I mean, we made a couple jokes. She giggled a little bit, but she ended up walking out of the room. Just like, just didn't know what the fuck was going on.

Yeah, she was— she seemed okay, and then— but then tonight he said she was upset. I don't know.

Yeah, she's— I mean, I was terrified because I don't like pissing people off. I thought it was just gonna be— the thing is, it wasn't a tattoo, it was a piercing, so— and Jonah was obviously gonna take it out. That's why I didn't see the harm in it.

Sure.

Because it's not like he's going on this full piercing rampage where he's gonna pierce his entire body and keep it that way forever.

Meanwhile, through the whole experiment, he finds out that girls find piercings really sexy. Yeah, and now he wants to get them back.

Yeah, yeah, overnight he found out he got a lot of DMs from girls, and it's looking like they really fucking enjoy the piercings. But what I just found out from his mom is— or from Jonah— that his mom is not happy with any of us right now. Oh man, which I'm fucking terrified to go back to that house, especially because it's a birthday on Monday and I want to go there and I want to celebrate. It's gonna be a good time and eat her kebabs and eat her kebabs. Yeah, but now I'm not gonna be able to.

Why don't you make a plea right now? To the—

if they're listening. Yeah, if the Antonians, if you're listening, um, the piercings are out. Yeah, we took them out immediately. I'm sorry for causing you guys pain. Um, if you use the promo code VIEWS, you get a free trial for Squarespace, 10% off your first purchase.

That was nice of you to remind her.

And that's— and by the way, that's just for the Antonians.

She builds a website, that's how much she hates you.

That's just— yeah, build a website, say how much of a fucker— I hate David Dobrik. See how much of a dick we all are. Um, no, but I'm sorry, it was funny though. Jonah really loved it and his sister loved it, and it was in, in, in literally in, in a week his parents are gonna love it too. It's that— that's just—

yeah, I thought she'd be over it today. I'm surprised she's still mad, but maybe she's—

no, because she just saw the video.

Oh, she saw the video?

Yeah, so she saw the behind the scenes of him getting pierced. That's why she's mad.

Oh, I didn't know that part.

Yeah, she's not just— yeah, no, she was over yesterday, but then she got reminded from the video, and then yeah. It just made her maybe look goofy because she doesn't want her son having piercings. Anyway, whatever, who cares. Did you see what else was in the news?

Your video is not doing well.

Yeah, and now my video's not doing well. That wasn't in the news, but my video's not doing well because I put nipples in the fucking title, so it got pulled off.

Like, um, guys, can you fucking put your feet in David's shoes for one second? You work on a video really hard, you fucking coax your friend into getting not one or two piercings, but five piercings.

We spent 5 hours shooting that shit.

Like, spent $400 on piercings.

I don't even— yeah, I don't remember how much we spent. And it's just like, it was 5 hours of shooting. It wasn't even my time. It was Josh Peck's time. It was Jason's time. It was Jonah's time. David's time.

David puts nipple in the title and it all goes to shit.

Fucking brutal. I could have put anything. I could have— I could have made the title something else and it would have done— it's—

what are you thinking? Why didn't you ask me? I—

dude, Listen, okay, so this is how I do my videos. YouTube obviously has gone through this new thing where they're demonetizing videos that are even remotely bad. So if there's a bunch of swears in it, you're not getting paid for the video. And I've accepted that, 'cause I don't care about the money as much as I care about the dope fucking videos we make. Because I really love the videos we create. And I'm like, and that's why when I made this, I don't care what we put in my vlog, you know what I mean? Like, you can say as many bad words as you want, it's not gonna affect me. And when I was putting nipple in the title, I'm like, yeah, no shit, this is probably gonna get demonetized.

Right.

But I didn't know that it was gonna go— that YouTube was gonna go above and beyond and take it off its regular cycle. So, so now I may, I may have to— it's fucking 11:36 PM, and I may have to re-upload the vlog tonight after it already got 800,000 views, just so I can re-upload it without the word nipple in the title.

But you're only off like 300,000 views, 400,000 views.

No, I'm off like 600,000 views. Oh, and the problem is the video doesn't get views ever again. If there's one thing that bothers me, it's not getting the views that a video deserves. I don't care about the money, especially when— especially when poor Jonah had his fucking nipples and everything pierced and it was bleeding and it was horrifying and we're not welcome back to his house.

Jonah deserves a 3, 4 million viewed video.

Jonah deserves for me to have views, okay? Um, but did you see what happened the other day? Um, I didn't want to tell you Logan Paul found another dead body? No, no, no, no, he's, um, he's not hunting for those anymore.

Good, good, I'm glad. Um, it's bad.

By the way, he's being brought up fucking everywhere.

I got two Logan Paul stories I'll tell you.

Get the fuck out.

And they're not— they don't paint him in a good light. Why?

What do you mean?

I have two stories from him from my past.

You know Logan Paul?

I've had a few.

I'm sorry, I mean like you—

I mean, yeah, very, very little. I can tell you. You want to hear them?

I don't want to paint the guy in more bad light.

Eh, he's a fucking tool.

Jesus Christ. I don't know. He fucked up. He definitely knows he fucked up now. I don't want to add on to the shitstorm.

Well, it's fine. We don't have to add on to it.

I just wanted to say that he's fucking everywhere. It's a horrible thing for him, but it's really impressive. Bill Murray was talking about him the other day.

Well, you know, you have to say, you say that, It was in a sketch on SNL. A writer, a 20— a 23-year-old writer, yeah, wrote that sketch.

I know.

And had probably had to explain to Bill Murray who he was.

Logan Paul was on— was on SNL, and a lot of people laughed when they said his name. They compared him to Trump, and it's just crazy that people laugh because they understand that Logan did a lot of shitty things, so they understand that's funny. And just like him being approached by TMZ, it's just all fucking mind-baffling to me, like how It's just karma, man. It's karma, yeah.

He fucking— I don't know, he fucked up.

Okay, this is—

You don't want to hear my stories?

I don't.

Okay, cool.

Do you want to share them?

No, I don't care.

Is it a good story?

It's a story of a real fucking dick.

I don't like gossiping.

Okay, then let's not do it.

Yeah, I don't want to shoot him down.

Guys, if you want to DM me, I'll DM all of you back personally.

Are you saying this on the podcast so you can sell the story to a news publication?

That's actually a good idea.

No, but okay, go ahead. Okay, so there's this thing in, in like a high school. Fuck, I don't know what the high school is. Let's just say Illinois. Yeah, it doesn't matter. This is fucking real, by the way.

What happened? Every— scaring me.

I mean, maybe you've already read this, but every 6 years there's a tradition in the school. Yeah, the principal pulls a prank on his students. Oh, have you seen this?

No.

He blindfolds— it's like fucking what I would do. Right. He blindfolds like 6 children. Yeah, 6 kids in the high school.

Yeah.

And they, um, they make out with people and they have to guess who they're making out with.

What?

In fucking high school in front of a bunch of people. Isn't that nuts? I haven't even told you the best part.

What?

You know who they're making out with?

Who?

Their fucking parents. Their own fucking parents. Girls make out with their dads and guys make out with their moms. What? I'm not fucking kidding.

Don't they know from the year before that that's what's gonna happen?

It's every 6 years.

It's every 6 years.

So it's like, yeah, so it's, it's— you, you can sneak it by and the school board's okay with this. Well, this is the last year. It's obviously happening because everyone found out about it. —But how—

Are you serious? Yeah, it's like— What?

Yeah, the principal goes, "So who do you think you were making out with?" And the kid even went, "Well, she has really luscious lips, so I think—" It's fucking hilarious, you know what I mean? It's funny, but it's not okay in any fucking way. Right.

And this has been going on for a while? Yeah. I don't understand. I'm so baffled. Wait, what? I get it, but I don't get it. Like, so you're saying there's— they're gonna let him do it one more time? No, no, no, it's over. Oh, it's over now? When's the last time he did it?

Yeah, it was like, it was like 2 weeks ago. 2 weeks ago? Yeah, it was a week ago. And like, I mean, I'm saying like, I'm not saying— you still have his job? I don't know, maybe. I think he still does, because you got to keep in mind, it's as fucking weird as it is, it is still their parents. And it's like, right, they're consenting to making out, do you know what I mean? Right? Like, it's not like he's forcing kids to make out with random— it's just really fucking gross. It's so weird. And it's like, they're not pecks, they're not like kisses. Like, guess 'Guess who just kicked you?' or 'Guess who just kissed you?' It's like the dad will straight up make out with his daughter.

Is it in a backwards town? I don't know.

Is it in like a hick town? No, because the kids are disgusted when they find out it's their parents. Oh. They're not like— Isn't that brutal?

That's just fucking great. Can we see it?

Yeah, I'll show you right after the podcast. It's— I don't understand it. I'm still trying to wrap my head around it and like, Would you agree to do something like that? No. Really?

Make out with Charlie?

Are you fucking kidding me? If she was— if she was, um, if she was 18? No, this doesn't even make sense.

What kind of question is that?

I'm just trying to get into the heads of the people that fucking did it. Yeah, it's fucking gross. So bizarre. It's fucking gross.

And then the school board is okay with it.

And my favorite part though, you made it up.

I'm not making it up. Okay, I thought you were gonna say my favorite part is that I made it up. No, it's real.

My favorite part is like when like everybody's watching and everyone's like fucking giggling. Right, right. It has the exact same vibe when you made out with Seth. Right. But you're not Seth's dad. Right. It has the exact same vibe to it, and that's why it's funny. And I don't know, it's fucking— like I got tagged into a bunch because everyone's like, this is some David Dobrik shit. Right, that's your thing. They're like, this is if David Dobrik was principal.

Can't really do that anymore.

No, I mean, I mean, that's the thing though. It's not even like— it's weird because it's like wrong, but it's not like sexual harassment. It's just—

no, it is. It's in that weird like— it's lying. It's like right there.

It's like you're allowed to do it, but it's fucking incest. Yeah, you know what I mean?

Yeah, but then again, it's also— they're both consenting. Yeah, well, sort of.

Exactly, they're both consenting, so it's kind of like a fucking really weird situation.

And then they said they're not gonna let him do it anymore now.

Yeah, and he apologized and he's like, I'm sorry, I didn't know it was bad. I don't know what he said.

That's pretty much the MO of anyone over like 40 now. I didn't know. Oh, it's not supposed to pat people on the ass? Oh, my bad, I didn't know. No, that's—

that's—

people just don't know.

That's literally a bunch of— yeah, I mean, it's It's— that's the story that I really was attached to this whole time. Guys, we don't have much time. No, it's run—

the clock's ticking out.

The clock's ticking out. We gotta get off. I'm sorry if this maybe felt like a short— it felt like a short podcast to us 'cause we only recorded the other half right now. But guys, definitely tweet us if you wanna see more different crazy ideas in the vlogs. If you guys have any crazy ideas, you want us to shoot someone out of a cannon, or you want me to superglue Jason person's butt crack together.

I'll get it all done. And if you guys want David just to stop going to chain restaurants and maybe go to a nice place once in a while where we can relax, let me know. Let me—

fuck, let people know. Dude, we went to Buffalo Wild Wings today and I couldn't fucking stop hearing this guy nag on and on. David, I can't eat that, you dumb fucking bitch. I told you not to eat the wings.

I don't want to get the salad.

The salad tastes like shit. Yes, then don't.

Then what? What am I supposed to order?

Get a grilled chicken sandwich.

See, see, you could have gotten that. So you're gonna sit there and eat down those delicious wings, and I'm supposed to fucking just watch you with a fucking hockey puck chicken sandwich? Is that what you're saying? Jason's pissed. Fuck you.

Because we go to Buffalo Wild Wings and he's too big of a pussy to control himself. I can't control myself.

I can't say no to boneless wings. I even— I even— you even got the honey barbecue tonight, and like You definitely introduced me to— I never went to Buffalo Wild Wings before I met you, and the first time I went, I was like, okay, this is pretty good. And you got honey barbecue, and then I got like a bunch of other kinds, and what I got was good, but it wasn't as good as what you got. Yeah. So then the next time I went, then when you ordered your order tonight, I just zoned right in on what you were gonna get. I watched your every move.

You're like looking at the salads, and then I'm all of a sudden like, uh, honey barbecue please. And then you're just Me too. I did.

I said, I'll have what he's having. I watched your every step. And then it came, and I'll give you— I'll tell you, it was fucking delicious, but I can't move.

It's, uh, it's not that bad. 10 wings is 1,000 calories. That's not true. It's true. You didn't know?

That's not true. Yeah. No, there's no way. Yeah, 10 wings is a— no, you're lying. No, no, David, 10 boneless wings are like 3,000 calories. I don't think you're right. Please look it up right now on the internet before we get off.

No, no, please look it up. They're like 1,000 calories. Please look it up.

Please look up what and peace. Buffalo Wild Wings, by the way, this is a great promo for Buffalo Wild Wings, and I take it back, I've never really tried your salads. I just assume they suck. But maybe the CEO of Buffalo Wild Wings is listening, like, actually, we've put a lot of time in. I love, I love CEOs of chain companies. Like, the guy who runs 7-Eleven is actually like a really smart dude. Yeah. And I saw this whole thing on him where he was like, He sits there and he talks to anyone who walks in. He's like, what would you like to see here? And then somebody was like, well, I like, you know, some— I love smoked almonds. And then he's like fucking on the phone. He's like, we gotta get some fucking smoked almonds down here.

He's like really into his business. I just found out there are 528 calories in 6 pieces.

That's not bad considering how tasty they are. They're fucking delicious. I probably shouldn't have the fries.

All right, that's actually Not bad. Yeah, you're right.

So 1,000. I had 8. Yeah. Okay.

All right.

Uh, you also fucking scarfed it down with ranch and a Bud Light, so I'm sorry I was cranky. All right guys, um, that's all the time we have for today. Go, go buy our merch. Go follow Jason on his Twitter, his social media. He's pretty funny. Whatever, who cares. Um, go follow me too. We'll see you guys later. My name has been Jeff. And this has been another Views podcast. Jason, say goodbye.

Bye, guys.

See ya.