Planning Our First Baby

What's up, guys?

Welcome back to Views. Natalie's here. Sorry, go.

Oh my God.

I know. Okay, Natalie's a story though. That's what I'm actually—

I don't have a story. I just—

Natalie said let's get on the pod right now.

I have a really good story, mostly because I have to get into meetings soon, so we need to podcast.

Who are you meeting with today?

I love businesswoman. Yeah, I love it.

Let's give Natalie some credit. Who are you meeting with today? Let's see if it pans out in the future. So kind of tee it up right now. Okay. Well, something people liked on the podcast is I brought up doing a bit in the airplane.

Yeah.

And then I saw a couple of comments on my airplane post with the, uh, fuck, with the boom boys. And they were like, wow, this made it out of the podcast. So now you tell us what brands you're talking to. And then when the brand deal's posted, we'll see if you succeeded.

Okay, well, fingers crossed for me, guys. Today I'm talking to Edelman.

Edelman?

Edelman. They're like one of the big 3 marketing agencies. They represent like—

Is that Edelman?

Great to see all of you guys at Edelman. It's Edelman, but thank you, Natalie. Thanks for jumping on the call.

Natalie's just forever hungry. Well, maybe it is. Maybe it was Edelman, but like I've heard of Edelman. I've just not heard—

It's probably Edelman. Edelman, like tomato, tomato.

Hey, we heard the pod. It's disrespectful. Okay, so you're getting on with Edelman. Edelman.

They represent like all the Unilever brands, which is— I mean, they have hundreds and hundreds of brands.

Give me one just so people know.

They have like PayPal, Starbucks, eBay, Heineken, Dove, all the Dove products.

I do like Heineken.

What about a reality show that would follow Natalie? The businesswoman, you know, that you would produce.

You know what my dream brand deals is?

Which one?

A good beer and a good cigarette company.

A good beer and a good cigarette?

Cigarette companies aren't allowed to advertise.

Yeah, we have to change that.

No.

What do you mean they're not allowed to advertise at all?

No, Natalie. What?

I don't think so. Oh, they like got rid of that, which is kind of wild.

Have you ever seen a Marlboro commercial?

I mean, I feel like I have, but I guess I haven't.

When you were 6?

No, no, no. Yeah, that's like not a thing. No, I mean, that would be pretty cool. No, sure.

Yeah. A Capri ad for you.

Like, cigarette commercials would be the best.

Marlboro Red.

Marlboro. 'Cause fuck it.

Well, maybe if the world was ending. I don't know. But like, we have about 5 years left here and they should be pretty—

like, what I love about— let me talk about things that are frowned upon to promote. Gambling is one thing that's frowned upon. I love gambling. Sure.

I've—

I've— we've gambled in the vlogs forever, but one of my favorite things about people that promote gambling on streams is there's a big thing over their stream that says, "Do not gamble, you will lose." I think that's—

Does everybody do that? A lot of people?

Most people. It's an option. You could say that, which is really interesting. Well, and like, if you're smart enough, you actually should take that advice, right?

Yeah.

Look, I love gambling. I'll do it myself, but like, now I don't do it really myself as much. I love to watch people gamble. I would love— like, if I could sit next to— like I've said this— if I could sit next to Steve for hours, I would. Yeah. And just watch him gamble. But yeah. Okay. So Edelman is coming. Can we get them on the pod? Can we just get the beginning of the Zoom call? Just, I want you to go, hello, Edelman. And I want to see what they say.

No, I'm not doing that.

I love that idea.

Yeah.

Yeah.

He wants me to mispronounce it in front of them.

Yeah. I want them—

He wants me to embarrass myself on the Zoom.

Well, no, I'll jump in and we'll say that this is a whole argument and we'll clarify.

That Natalie's an idiot?

No, how about we put money on it? Because I genuinely think you may be right. It may be Edelman. How about we bet $500?

I don't want to lose $500.

Edelman or Edelman?

You really are a gambler, aren't you?

Today Jason bet me $500 I'd make a basketball shot in my backyard.

I thought no way it would happen. He came out cold. Naveen and I were out there. I owe Naveen $500. And then Dave walked out and I was like, okay, you can shoot it further from from Naveen and cold. He just hit it. He hit like a 3-pointer. Wait, further than a 3-pointer.

$500. I can't believe you offered me that much. I was like, are things like that good with you, Jay?

Or you're just terrible.

Do you and Naveen— Naveen, you want to grab the mic? Naveen's here. Do you and Naveen, have you guys joined your bank accounts yet? Or is this a sore subject? Or how does this work? Naveen, do you have access to the Jason Nash credit card?

I could take his card.

Yeah, she takes my card.

Is she ever like—

is it okay for most things?

Really?

Yeah. Pay for most things.

What do you mean you pay for most? You guys are married. Don't you guys just kind of pay? Yeah. What do you mean you pay for most things?

Well, I mean, my physical card comes out for most things.

Like his money is ours and then my money is mine.

Yeah.

Damn, that is nice.

That's so nice.

I have a pretty sweet deal over here.

So was there a moment when you get married, was there a moment where you guys went into Was there a prenup signed?

No.

No.

Okay.

No.

I don't even know whose end it would be. What part? I am wondering.

Okay.

So there's, so, so, okay. So when you get a divorce, Naveen, you could take half the money theoretically.

Theoretically. Yeah. But I think you shouldn't marry someone if you feel like they would take anything from you.

I don't think anybody ever marries anybody like that.

I think you can tell.

I don't know.

Really?

No, I don't. I think people change over the years.

I agree with David.

I mean, it's really possible.

I think especially when you have like a bad breakup.

I think people change if there's like something, like if someone does something so awful to you and then it gets like vindictive.

I think if you cheat, if you cheat, it's fair game. Take the money. Because I think that's like a legally binding thing. But if it's just like falling out of love.

Yeah.

I don't know. Like, I don't know. I think that's where, like, I— sorry, I think that's where the prenup should be void is if you cheat. But like, I don't know. I also have like such a warped perception because like when I do get— when I do fall in love, you know damn well I'm not going to want to sign a prenup. Like, I'm going to be like, I would never— she'd never take this money. And then now he's going to be like, you better make her sign it.

And then I'm going to go wrong with having one. I feel like. But it does take the romance out of it.

It's what you said. Yeah, it does. Like, kind of kill the vibe.

Yeah.

But isn't it kind of like in today's in today's world more normal.

I think for someone like you, you definitely, being the age that you're at.

I think that philosophy is also true when you don't have millions and millions of dollars worth of assets. I think that's different. For an average American that makes an average income, that's fine. But when there's so much more on the line, I just think that's just normal.

For me too, if Naveen and I broke up, I still would take care of her.

Wow, that's really sweet.

You know what I mean?

Oh, nice.

Of course.

Wait, so taking you back to this credit card thing. So, Naveen, like, if you, if you wake up tomorrow and you're like, I need this fucking Fendi bag, like, I need to go get a Fendi bag right now. Okay, what's that? What, do you talk to Jason? Do you like—

if I wanted something like a purchase like that where it's like, like he'll see it on the statement, like, yeah, I probably wouldn't unless— yeah, I don't think he's ever checked his statement.

Really?

Nevine has a bad, I think you have like a bad, there's like a chasm, like I think people maybe might look at you and think you'd want a Fendi bag.

Yeah, I don't.

But she doesn't do that, she literally thrifts and she like.

I like secondhand.

We'll be in the store and I'll be like, we were walking on Abbot Kinney the other day and I was like, let's buy you something.

You like bags, you can buy me.

Let me get you something, you know, like, you know, let's buy you a dress. And she's like, no, absolutely not, I'm not gonna pay full price for anything. Yeah, I'm weird about expensive purchases. She's really good like that.

I get that, but I think like even like, I wouldn't consider myself that kind of person.

You're not that kind of person. Person either.

But definitely once a year I do get the moment where I'm like, I gotta get this watch, even though it's like, whatever, who cares? Like, it's just a watch and I have—

Right. But those watches retain their value too. Yeah, that's not that crazy of a purchase. Do you ever like—

Oh, that actually motivated me to buy another watch.

Do you ever go to like Hugo Boss or like, I don't know, do you ever go to like Neiman Marcus and you're like, I'm gonna buy myself a wardrobe?

Never, never, never, ever.

You get clothes for free and that's what you wear. Pretty much.

Yeah. I mean, I really fuck with Young LA. Like, I love Young—

like, I got a great shirt from them the other night during the sperm race. Yeah, I took it home. Hope you don't mind.

That's fine.

Do you want it back?

No, no, please, please, you keep it. I like them because they're just like good for any occasion. Like, one time I'll buy clothes is if we're like 2 weeks into like a trip somewhere or like we're in Miami and it's like a special night out. And everyone's feeling the, let's go to Kith. Kith is the one place where I'm like, okay, I can go.

People don't know what Kith is.

Really?

That's really funny. It's funny to us. I think most people. Do they have Kith in other cities?

Just New York, LA, Miami.

It's like, what is that? Kith is like this, like, for guys, which is so silly. It's like really, really high-end stuff for guys.

It's for girls too.

Oh, really?

Yeah, they have girls stuff too.

You can buy $2,000 sneakers in there, right?

Yeah.

And it's really trendy.

Trendy as hell.

The trendiest of trendy items.

Yeah, the best of the best.

Like, okay, so, so it's kind of like Supreme, but Supreme is like hypewear.

Supreme's its own brand.

It's higher end than Supreme.

It has other brands in it.

Like, it's—

Kith has their own brand, but they also have like other designer brands and other streetwear.

And it's so like hip and stuff. They'll have like, uh, an ice cream bar.

Uh, Kith Treats.

Yeah, they'll have like an ice cream bar inside the store. And now they're coming up with Kith in, uh, in New York. In New York, it's $36,000 to join.

What?

Yeah, because it's a paddle club, so you can play padel there. Oh, so it's like a wellness club. It's $36,000 to join and $7,000 per year.

Oh, wow.

Yeah. And you get Kith clothing and you get to play paddle there.

And they have an Erewhon smoothie bar. The first—

it's the first Erewhon in New York.

Unbelievable.

It's like the Erewhon of clothing. Yeah, kind of. Yeah, actually, that's probably the best way to describe it.

Yeah.

They have a big one in Malibu now that I saw.

But yeah, so that's the only time I'll splurge. Okay, so you don't use the credit card just 'cause you don't ever feel the need to?

Yeah, I'll use it if it's groceries and stuff. But I also feel like if I really wanted something, I think he would get it.

Yeah, for sure.

He doesn't really say no.

When you guys first got married, or when you guys first started dating, and I mean, Naveen, did you automatically know what Jason's financial situation was?

I still to this day have no idea.

You still have no idea?

Yeah. Okay. Because genuinely, I don't have any idea.

You don't?

I think he's a big panicker.

Yes.

So I think if he lived in Vernon Hills, right where I'm from, like our suburb, that's like a pretty— is affluent the right word?

Yeah.

Good word. Thank you so much. Thank you, guys.

Your vocabulary has come up.

That's nice.

Really nice.

Come abroad.

Yeah, that's good. Borrow. Come on my face.

Yes. Yeah. Like if you lived in Vernon Hills.

Yeah.

Not necessarily where we grew up because we were like lower on the totem pole, lower in the Vernon Hills area. But you'd be one of the richest people in Vernon Hills for sure.

Yeah.

For sure. Like undisputed heavyweight champion Jason Nash.

I fucked up when I bought my house. I should have bought a cheaper house. That's the big one.

But when you're like looking at it from the outside, You know, it's Jason Nash, doesn't make a lot of money.

Right.

But I think just the lifestyle you live with what you want to provide for your kids is extremely expensive. So I too do not know how much money you make.

Like, I know no one knows.

Yeah.

No one knows.

Like, I know the joke is like Jay doesn't make a lot of money.

He's broke.

He's broke.

But like nobody knows.

But like he's obviously not broke.

But yeah, but he's not. So like, nobody, you still don't know.

I have no idea. And to be honest, I don't know if he knows because he forgets like logins and stuff. I just don't see him like logging into a bank and like knowing.

I go into my bank.

You do?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

What's the last time you went to go check how much you have in your account?

Yesterday.

How much is in there?

$2,000.

No, it's not. No, it's not.

No, but that's just like an account. Like, that's not like—

yeah, that's like— yeah, that's like his gummy— to buy gummy worms for the kids account. How much is in the full thing, if you had to guess?

In my account right now, in like the account that I use daily, like $15,000.

Okay, but what about like, what about like the savings?

Like stocks and stuff?

Yeah.

In savings, not much. And then in stocks, I have a lot.

Okay, great.

And like, it's in your like retirement stuff.

Yeah, you get taxed. You get taxed if you, if you use it.

I understand, I get it. Jay, if you have to leave the country right now. Yeah. You have to. You're going to fucking Nicaragua. You got to get out of here. Pulling all the money from your stocks, not including your house, how much money do you think?

Um, maybe like $400,000.

Okay. Yeah, it's incredible. And then probably another—

I think way more than that.

No, no, no, no, no.

I can tell by people's facial—

like, no, I've had to dip into it this year. I had to take money out.

Yeah. I mean, that's like, that's really incredible.

Yeah. I got to find something new, man. I don't know if I need to sell my body or go start selling cars or— I saw— I saw— oh, you also— Postmates make—

you also have a couple hundred grand in your house.

Um, like hidden in there?

Like, they made an offer on my house and it was an offer where I, um, wouldn't make any money on the house.

Yeah, but you put down payment down so you get that money back. Like, there's money that you, you make like $200,000 selling your house. Yeah, back. Yeah, yeah.

So like, yeah, but then where do I live? You know what I mean?

So where do we live? Yeah. I mean, my parents back in the day probably had $4,000 in their bank account. I can't even— you know what I mean? Not that much, but like $20,000, $25,000.

Right. But I mean, they didn't live in LA. They didn't—

No, I know. They didn't have kids in college.

They didn't have a kid.

I'm just saying you panic too much. You should relax.

Yeah.

Just chill out.

Yeah.

You're always in a panic. It's good that you're in a panic state because you'll continue to make money. But don't worry, your kids are 18. They're going to have to start fending for themselves.

What could Naveen and I do? You're great. You're great with ideas.

How to make money?

Yeah, yeah, you're really good at this, and that's good too.

I think doing what you do is fine. I just think like, I don't think you should— you have to live in LA for, for much longer. I think wait, just leave. Wait till you— yeah, get the fuck out of here. Go to Austin. Go to— I don't know, I keep saying expensive. Sorry, go, go anywhere. Go any—

go to Milwaukee.

Go to one of those cities. Don't go there. No, go to one of those cities like when you're like your kids— not come on.

Florida.

You're leaving the grocery store and the sky's all red and orange.

Yeah, we have that here.

No, we don't have it. It's very rare to get here. It's like a Florida or probably like a South thing or go to Vernon Hills, brother. You'll live like a king.

Is there anywhere else where you've considered like, oh, I live there?

I would go. I feel like I wouldn't like Texas, but I would go live there. I would go give it a try.

I don't know why I've been coming around to Texas too.

I mean, Naveen's from Texas, which is good.

I've met a lot of people from Texas.

So if we have a baby, I can dump the baby on them.

On all of Texas?

No, on your family.

Oh, your family's there?

Yeah, yeah, my family's there.

Oh, okay.

I'll have a baby, but I don't want to do anything.

Yeah, we've agreed that Jason will not have contact while it's a baby, and then when he's older, he'll hang out with the baby.

See him when he's 4.

Oh, that's amazing.

I don't want to do it.

You'll see him when he's four. So you guys are going to have a kid?

Yes. Things have changed. We've talked.

Wait, wait, wait, wait.

Time out.

Beating him down.

Yeah.

Wait, wait.

You were a big part of that, actually.

Good.

Instigating the conversation. Yeah.

No, Dave. Dave's. Dave's really great. I. I wish people could know how great you are, but every time I say it, people go, what?

Wait, what did I do?

I'm joking, but Dave is in your corner. He was like, he's like, you gotta, you gotta have a baby. You can't just fucking leave her out to dry. And I was like, yeah, you're right, you're right.

Yeah, because I guess it's a big part of that. People took it as like, oh, if Jason doesn't have a baby with me, like, I'll never have a baby. But it's like, oh, I'll, I'll go have a baby with someone. I never understood that.

Yeah, we were driving over here, we were driving over here, and she was on Instagram.

What did you see?

There's like this 70-year-old, like, really wealthy, like, very old man, 79-year-old billionaire, who's basically said he's looking for someone to have two sons for him. And I was like, act right, Jason. So Jason's agreed to have one kid.

Wait, so you would go— would you leave Jason to have this child, or you would just go explore other options so that you could have a child but also still be with Jason?

Wait, I think this is a beneficial thing for both of you to have a 79-year-old's baby, right?

For sure.

That's why I was saying, like, I'd be happy to stay with Jason, but I don't think he wants to live with a kid. That's what he was saying.

Can you mix Jason's sperm with this guy's sperm so it's 25% his and all of his money?

25% Jason's? No, character-wise, financially.

The truth is, when you get a kid, you love the kid. And I know I would. I'd be good. I'm good. I like kids a lot.

Can you backtrack, Jay, a little? Because you were— okay, so we have to go back to the night of Susie's, uh, what was it, Vardhan's birthday? Yeah, we're in the— I was, and I brought up, I said, when are you guys gonna have kids?

That was so funny because we had been like going back and forth about it, and then I was like, fine, I won't mention it anymore, don't talk to me about it. And then we'd like go out to have like a night out and you go, when are you guys having kids? Which isn't something you ever asked us.

No, it's so funny. It's so— inserting yourself.

Jason looked at me and he goes, Way to go, Dave. And then Jason was like, I can't have kids. And I'm like, what? Like, I couldn't believe it. I'm like, wait, well, Naveen really wants kids. Like, unfortunately, yeah, like, you're going to have to have another kid just because, yeah, because, you know, you lucked out with Naveen here. You have to pay the piper. You have to like—

Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I would like— That's why I play the lottery every week for the kids. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, so I have this fantasy that I'll come in and be like, all right, let's go.

So you were, you were very against the having the kid.

Yeah.

When we were at this party. And now this is the first time I'm hearing this. You guys have talked and all of a sudden—

I think he was just stressed out, but then I came up with like a whole concept of family vlogs. No, no, no.

What did you say?

Family vlogs. A whole concept. It's called Monday, Wednesday, Friday, 4 PM. Family vlogs.

It's gotta work.

Oh man, we did that. Oh my God, I did that with kids.

Really?

Yeah. And now that— now, you know, I wish I hadn't.

Well, you just don't know.

I'm 50/50 on family vlogs. I don't— I'm obviously— I'm so biased because I'm a YouTuber, but yeah, I don't know. I don't understand what— I guess I do. I get it and then I don't get it why it's like bad.

It's not really fair to the kid because the kid is just like there and they're like, oh great, a camera, let's film. But the kid doesn't know.

That he gets more toys? What do you mean? I think that's awesome. I used to do that.

Like, yeah, I literally would do that. I'd be like, you're gonna go to Toys R Us? They'd be like, fuck yeah. I'm like, let's go.

Fuck yeah. I don't know. I know how I grew up. Like, if I grew up and my family was vlogging and I was getting perks of it, I'd be like, okay, let's rock. But I know that that's just a very specific example. I'm a very specific example of that.

I mean, there's a lot of good things. My kids got to go to really cool stuff. Stuff when they were younger that, that really inspired them. You know, like my son got to see Herbie Hancock when he was 10 years old.

Yeah, because it was—

I was vlogging.

Yeah.

And that inspired him to get into music. I know it did.

Yeah.

You know.

Yeah, for sure, Jake.

You're talking about that.

What was my time on the sperm race?

Um, okay, so sorry. And, and then what was the conversation that led you guys to be like, it's gonna happen?

So I was just kind of like telling him really like people have kids and they have like no money, or they have like— saying this firm term though, like my family is like pretty middle class and my dad's still having kids.

Like, yeah, her dad has a kid.

Normal.

Yeah, no, Jay, I know. Oh, okay, I understand how it gets.

Yeah, so I kind of just like pitched him an idea of like a life together and like potential jobs and like things we can do and how to make it work and—

right. Oh, that's amazing. And what was the pitch? Was it, where does it take place?

Yeah, what do you do?

Oh, remember yesterday? You're so funny.

Why?

She was like talking this big game last night. She's like, you know, I've been reading a lot of—

Oh, Chinese medicine?

She's like, I've been reading about a lot of Chinese medicine and, you know, I've just been learning so much. And then I go, oh yeah, like what? And she goes, I didn't think he was going to ask me to elaborate.

Well, I have this like grand idea for my son who doesn't exist yet, but him and I are going to start this business together, but I'm going to start the business while I'm pregnant and then build it and then give it to him.

Okay. So what's the business?

So our son's name is going to be Napoleon.

Okay.

And it's called Napoleon's Complex, and it's like a rage room for kids, kind of, where you can have a food fight and big personalities are welcome.

That's really funny.

Can you see me working there?

That's really funny.

Can you see me at Napoleon's Complex?

Tantrums are celebrated there.

Tantrums are celebrated.

Yeah.

Wow, that's interesting. Feels like when this kid comes, Jason's going to have to be using the rage room a couple of times. He'll be the first customer at Napoleon's Complex. Fuck this! I'm stuck at age! Twins!

Oh my God, what do I say when I wake up every morning?

You just scream fuck.

Oh my God, it's fuck! Wait, this is amazing. Good for you guys. Wait, so this is any second now?

Uh, I don't know, maybe.

I'm not sure. So I just quit, like, I'm like taking down my energy drink intake and I just want to be like really healthy before I—

I'm waiting for a big score, you know.

Wait, wow, this is amazing.

Wait, make out with one more dude, you know, for another $25K.

Wait, are you actively trying to make babies?

No, no, no, not trying yet, but pretty soon, I hope.

I mean, wow, this is amazing.

Yeah, what— maybe we'll sell the house.

How many vlogs away are we from you surprising me with this pregnancy?

Oh, how many David vlogs?

Yeah, yeah, post it once every 2 weeks. Is this something we can get going for December?

I'll talk to Naveen.

Trying to think when we don't have an idea. Let's see.

Yeah, I mean, Natalie pregnant be the big one.

I just can't do that with her yet.

What?

We're not ready.

Natalie pregnant thumbnail, that would really crush.

Natalie pregnant thumbnail.

Natalie married. I can imagine it now.

That's crazy.

How is that going? Any— anything happening?

No, actually, that was my story that I know that we started this saying Natalie had a story, and I actually never had the opportunity to tell it.

Very good. Just classic Views fashion. That's all the time we have for today too.

Short pod today.

Natalie has a story. We're going to make this pod a short one.

But I was just thinking, because I have been talking to this guy, whatever, that you guys know.

Yeah.

And I was thinking he's very nonchalant about whatever. And David is sick of me speaking about this person. He's like, okay, hold on.

That's fucked up. Don't do that. If he's going to be your husband, don't put that out there like that.

So you come into work—

No, not in a bad way. Not like you're sick of him. It's just like I talk about him an overwhelming amount. And like, there's nothing that we've done in our friendship, relationship, whatever. Yeah, no progress.

She talks about him.

Really? She bends your ear about it? She comes into work?

Yeah, there's so much stuff going on, but they haven't like kissed.

Oh, we've kissed, we've kissed. We just haven't like done anything more than kissed.

But, but they've been talking for so long and hanging out for so long, and he'll like, after the club, he'll drive her home. Like, he's very sweet. He actually, I will say, he's very, very nice. He brought I don't know what we were doing. We were just having like a pool day and he brought me—

we were doing Alex's— he came over for Alex's like club room bit.

Yeah, yeah. And he brought me like tequila. Like he brought me like a gift. Oh wow. He's like, I didn't want to come to your house empty-handed. I was like, oh, that's crazy.

Like you're the dad. Yeah, yeah.

I went straight to Natalie. Like, this guy's a freak. No, no, no, no. But he's very nice. He's very, very nice.

He wants your blessing.

And he obviously really likes Natalie, but I'm just like, I'm not frustrated with him. I'm frustrated with Natalie. Yeah, yeah. I'm like, you keep talking this fucking You keep talking about this guy all the time, and it's like you're hesitant to pull— all you talk about is wanting to find somebody, and like you finally have somebody, but like they'll talk like at the pool party, right? They talked for like 6, 7 hours, and then I come downstairs and Natalie's here like eating a peanut butter jelly sandwich with her two girlfriends watching the fucking Catfish show on Netflix. I'm like, what the fuck are you doing here, Natalie? Like, why aren't you with your guy? Like, why are you still here?

That's really funny.

Because in my head, I'm like, this poor guy had to talk to you for 6 hours and you just made him leave? Like, at least be cuddling here on the couch or something.

That's really funny.

Why did you—

No, I think that's good.

No, I also didn't make him leave. He had to go.

I would have to go too after 6 hours.

Why do you think that's good, Naveen?

Did you call me Natalie? Well, I think just doing it that way, because it's like if they're cuddling on the couch, it's gonna like lead to more. The longer you can wait, I just really believe a guy will marry you the longer you wait. It's a weird thought process, but yeah, maybe.

Um, but that was like my whole thing. Like, I obviously have this crush, and like every day— and like, we don't talk every day. Like, I'll see him like maybe once on a weekend, whatever. But like, mentally, I'm like spiraling, right? It's like I'm thinking about him every day. Like, he's like fully consuming my thoughts. And I'm just wondering, like, is that like such a girl— like, I know that's such a girl thing.

Also, I'm not saying that she should fuck him.

Oh, no, no, I know, I know.

You're saying like spend time with him?

Yeah, I'm just like, yeah, yeah. I'm not like— I'm not saying like, Natalie, he deserves to have sex with you at this point. Like, that's not what I'm saying.

I'm just—

I'm saying like, Like you talk about him and it's just the same thing over and over again.

Just like progressive.

Yeah.

Well, maybe it's his fault too.

Wait, so what's your issue?

For sure it's his fault.

What's his fault?

I'm just kidding.

You're listening to this man.

He's a virgin. I don't even think he knows we have a podcast.

Like I was telling you the other day, I was saying, oh, you should pursue this person, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Like really step up and be a man.

Telling me?

Yeah. And I do think it takes the man to It do take the man. Yeah, I can call you and be like, it do take the man.

It do take it.

Hey man.

But yeah, he's gotta step up, right?

Oh yeah.

Yeah. Like with you, I really stepped up. I said, oh, this is it.

A lot of stories I hear of people on their wedding day, it'll be like the bride or somebody talking about how they first met or the bridesmaid. And a lot of the stories are along the lines of, he asked me on a date, I said no. Yeah, then he asked me on another date. I said no. Yeah, and it's a lot of that. I hear that. It was just kind of crazy to me because like if a girl doesn't want to go out with me, like that's it. Like I'm not— I like— I'm not gonna bother her about another. Like that's like— that sounds fucking insane to me. Oh really? Yeah, like if she like— well, I just— I'm like a strong believer in like if they want to, they would, or whatever, you know what I mean?

Like, oh, I'm a strong believer in the opposite.

So you have to hunt them down?

Yeah, really, you gotta hunt them down.

Oh, that's interesting.

Yeah, but also play it cool.

Wait, okay, sorry, sorry. So now what's your dilemma?

Well, I was just thinking, like, do men get that way? Like, I feel like, obviously in my head I'm like, oh, he's just like going about his week and working and doing whatever.

Well, like, is he thinking about you as much as you're thinking about him?

Yeah, like, do men spiral as much as like women do?

When it comes to friends with me, how many times have I spiraled?

I mean, are we being for real?

Why?

Because like you don't really— you don't— you like— well, I don't know, it's kind of hard to tell with you because like you're not really serious about a lot of things.

Yeah, you're right. Like I'll spiral and I'll get over it.

Yeah, you'll like fake spiral. Like you're spiraling just because you want us to like give you attention to talk to you. You just like want something to talk about, so you're like, well, this will get her to sit here and talk to me.

Okay, interesting.

Hmm.

Does he text you every day?

No, no, of course not.

Oh, how often does he text you? Just like on the weekends?

Just on the weekends, yeah.

That's still pretty good.

She's kind of in a bad spot.

Why?

Because if he's not stepping forward, then what's she to do?

I just don't understand it. Like, okay, so the other day we were going to the club and she was like, we just got done filming the bit, the fucking fire hose bit with Alex.

Yeah.

And we went to Paris Hilton's afterparty. And then we were fucking tired, but our buddy Alex was DJing this club for the first time. So we're like, we got to go stop by just to say hello. And Natalie was like, well, he wants to come and meet me at the club, this guy that she's talking to. And she's like, but I don't— like, I can't be there for long. Like, I'm so tired. I want to go home. Like, how do I explain that to him? And I'm like, this is the type of shit that pisses me off. I'm like, call him, you fucking moron. Like, you've been talking to him for— like, how is that hard to communicate at this point? Like, you guys sat there for 6 hours. Like, the second you could sit somewhere with 6 hours, like, I could tell him anything. Yeah, just FaceTime him and tell him exactly what happened.

Yeah, I'm too tired.

I'm too tired, but I would have to see you for 20 minutes. But like, I can't go home. I can't go home with you tonight. Like, just tell him that.

But then exactly what I thought was gonna happen, I ended up sitting there for 3 hours and talking to him, which was fine. Like, I had a great time, but like, that's why— that's why I was trying to like—

did you enjoy talking to him for 3 hours?

Yeah, yeah.

Okay, so no harm, no foul.

I don't know.

And if you wanted to leave, you could have left. That's just up to you. I really—

maybe she just wanted to get your take on it because she—

oh, she wants— she wants my attention.

She—

oh, she's spiraling. Oh my gosh, she's in love with me.

Spiraling. She just wants to know what you would do.

No, no, no, no, that's not true.

I want his male advice.

No, she's actually like panicking.

No, yeah, I was fully panicked because I like—

Bobby, please. I'll be like, Natalie, please stop. And then she'll be like, please help me. I'll be like, shut up. And then she's like, please, please, please. Oh, um, so like, no, she is panicky about it. I just, I, I feel like at this point, like, I don't know.

Well, because my whole issue is that like, I feel like at this point, well, okay, either myself or him needs to like propel things forward.

Totally. That's my frustration here is like, they just—

and I totally understand that and I agree. I just don't want to be that, like, if the same principle, if he wanted to, he would, right?

Like, that's like I mean, it's a two-way street. I'm sorry. Like, this is like, I think there are like standards, like guys should pay for the bills, guys should open and hold the doors, whatever, walk near the road, all that stupid shit. But I think when it comes to like who likes who, whose movie, what for, I think it's two-way street.

So what should she do? What would you say exactly? Give her the words, write it and say it.

Let's write the text to him right now.

No, she should be like, I don't think a text. Yeah, no, she should do it. I literally, okay. I didn't know I went on a date, but I went on a date the other day.

Yes, right.

And like, in the car, I didn't know it was a date. I was just saying it was a date because it was just fun for me to tell my friends that I'm going on a date.

Yeah.

But then when I got there, I was like, is this a date? And I didn't know. And then there was a third person involved, and they were like, oh my God, you guys are on a date. And I'm like, I don't know if this is a date.

It was on a two-person date.

No, there's somebody else there.

Love that.

That we ran into. Yeah, it's hard to explain. So then When I got back in the car with this girl, I was like straight— I was like, what is this? I was like, is this a date? Oh no. And she's like, I think so. And I'm like, oh, if this is a date, okay, cool, it's a date. And then I was like, you have to spell it out for me. I literally said— I said this word for her. I was like, you have to spell this out for me. Like, are we hanging out again? Do I have to wait to text you? Are we doing something this weekend? Do you want me to play it cool? Like, give me it, give me it all. Cuz like, I'm good, I'm 29 years old. So like, if you don't want to see me again, amazing. If you want to hang out, cool. If you want to hang out I think that's really good. If you also want to hang out as friends, I'm totally down to just be friends. Yeah, but, or if you want to do like a second date, the proper second date stuff, let's do that too.

I think it's terrible, but I think he's coming off right now very intense.

Yeah, yeah, this is very aggressive. I'm on a date though. I'm like very like, this is like—

I think he was much sweeter in the moment, but I think that like conveying your feelings and being clear is really good.

Totally.

Now I don't want to go home and, and be like to Natalie like, no, what do I do? Because that's what I was doing with her, the like, when I didn't meet up with this girl yet. I was like showing her, I was showing Natalie all the texts. I was like, I don't know how to read this person. Like, that's because I never hung out with her. Right. But then once I hung out with her, I'm like, it's just me and you now. Like, no need to communicate with Natalie. I'm going to ask every single thing I need to ask to you. I'm no longer going to guess. I'm just going to ask you.

This has been really fun. I'm going to go.

No!

I'll text Natalie.

I'll stick with texting Natalie.

Thank you, David.

No, no, I know I'm like coming off like—

no, that's great.

I know I'm coming off aggressive right now, but that's not how it was in the morning.

I think that is great. Like, if I had somebody that was actually being like clear and concise and like communicating, like, you're stuck in the fucking '70s where TV shows—

no, no, no, it's like this, it's like this. You go on the date with her, you decide, you decide if you want to see her again. That's your decision. I, I think this in-between kind of thing is what your generation does, and I think that's why there's like I'm not saying in between at all.

I'm saying the complete opposite. I'm saying right now, let's decide. Let's see each other or not. And then she's like, yeah, I'd love to. I'm like, I'd love to too. I'll see you Friday. Yes.

I think it would be much better— it's Naveen— wouldn't it be much better if he was like, this was an awesome time, I had the best time, I want to see you again, when are you free?

I definitely said that. I definitely said that.

Isn't that much better?

Yeah, but he's saying that, he's just also saying like, if you do— if you just want to be friends, that's cool. Like, he just wants to know Yeah, I don't—

I don't want to, like— I don't want to waste my time with someone who's, like, on the fence or not in the position to, like, be going on dates. I just think mentally, I just think women like to be pursued, don't they? But I will pursue her. Just give me—

you just want to know.

I'm wrong.

I don't know. I like—

I like—

I like clear.

Okay, so, okay, so this brings me back to Natalie. You just have to literally say the words What are we? It is so funny.

Oh my God. I would literally throw up and die.

It's so funny.

I would literally pass out. No, no, no, no. It's no, don't say it in text. Just, it's such a funny, awkward thing to talk about that. Like, it's like, I love talking about those funny awkward things.

I don't like thrive in those like high con, not confrontational, but confrontational scenarios.

That's really funny.

Like you love to have a conversation with people or like have friends that are like on the opposite side and like have a debate and like, figure out who the fuck is more right than the other. Like, I can't do that. Uh, I don't know.

Can we get Naveen's opinion? What do you think Natalie should do?

Yeah, I think that the next time he wants to hang out— yeah, or like the next time he talks to you, just don't respond, because then that puts him in the position of like either stepping forward—

that's wild. I just feel like If you didn't respond to me, I'd never text you again.

Well, we're not there. Like, we're also friends.

I mean, that's crazy.

I just think putting her in the position of asking what they are is not—

I agree.

The right position for you. Like, I don't think—

I don't think we're there yet, right?

Okay, sorry. What are we? Don't use those words then. Just be like, where do you see this going? Do you want to have sex, or do you want to like—

or have like someone—

imagine getting that. Imagine getting that from a girl. Getting that text. Where do you see this going?

No, not a text.

No, no, no, this is an in-person discussion.

Where do you see us by next week?

Yeah, but this is—

where do you see—

this isn't their first date. This is— they've hung out 10 times.

We've hung out 4 or 5 times. That's it.

That's a lot.

That's a lot, dude.

That's a lot. Okay, you should have— you should hire someone.

Here we go.

To come up— private investigator.

David will do it.

You just have someone come up to you and make it awkward. Oh my God, you guys are so cute. Are you guys dating?

Ilya did that.

He did?

Yeah.

What did he say?

He said— this isn't gonna sound good. Well, Ilya came up to us and he said, um, he was like, he's like, wow, you're really tall. You guys would make a really good couple.

Yeah.

And then, and then it was really awkward because like he came out of fucking nowhere.

But what did he—

and then he said, um, wow, you're really tall.

He was jealous.

He was like something like, huh, we're not a couple, but 'Whoever will be, will be very lucky,' or something like that. Something like that. I don't remember exactly.

Naveen's mouth is wide open right now. What does that mean?

Wait, that's not—

I, I, I read— I don't read that as horrible. I don't read it— I don't know, it's pretty neutral.

I think it's new. Yeah, I guess it's neutral.

I don't think that gives me anything.

I mean, I don't think he was gonna be like, 'Yeah, we're a couple.' But like, that's the moment where you like—

how do you not— like, where do you just panic? I just don't know. How does that conversation not be like, how does that not blossom into something? That's what I'm so confused about. You're 30 years old. Like, how can you not just be like—

I just avoid like conversations like that. I just—

you're so good. You would— if I was like, you need to fire Taylor today, you would be like, happily. Not Taylor, but like, you love—

Taylor's like listening to this and she's like right out the door probably. She's like, huh?

No, Taylor will never ever ever ever ever get fired. She's the best. Natalie would go 10 years before Taylor. But that's not what I'm saying. I'm just saying you love to have those hard-hitting conversations in fine with business. So how on earth are you so scared of this?

Because like, like being emotional makes me extremely uncomfortable.

Oh, it's your black heart. I totally forgot.

No, so that's why I would say you should have a big conversation, because then you're confronting that, and I think that would make you stronger.

This is really long. How, how long have we been talking about this?

We should just call this guy.

Yeah, you should call him.

Can we just call him on the pod?

No, no, no, he doesn't— he's like not online.

Amazing. He'll never know We wouldn't even say it's a pod.

We'd just cry.

It's just like, we just let it call.

I understand where you're sitting, Natalie.

It's really, really hard to read.

He needs to step up or get out.

No, you got to talk to this guy. I'd love to hear people's opinions about this. Please DM me.

Yeah.

Please DM me. Let me know what to do.

Yeah, leave a comment. Let us know who's right.

I think there's a world—

Naveen or David?

Tell me if I'm a freak and I should just stop talking.

No, I think there's a world in which— I think Naveen's right.

Wait, I also think David's right.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Oh, you do?

I'm not— yeah, I think there's like a blend of everything that was said.

You knew all the details. Like, this is just more than like an hour-long podcast, but there's like so much to this that makes no sense and makes it so complicated where I don't feel like—

I'm sorry, I don't, I don't, I don't understand what that means.

If I had to guess, if I had to guess, it's a conversation.

Because I also just don't want to like— if he just wants to be friends, I don't want it. Like, we have so many mutual friends, like, I don't want to just say that. Just say that.

Just like, it's not going to ruin it.

I just don't want to look like a loser.

You haven't even had sex with him, so it's not like it's like—

that's why I even feel like more of a freak. I'm like, why do I like— am I Why am I so attached to this person?

Well, you like him.

You got to talk to this guy. I'm sorry. How can you talk to him for so long? Dude, if I sat at a party with a girl for over 30 minutes, 40th minute, and I'm like, what is this? I give that much energy to a person that you've given this guy.

But you're like, you're a weirdo.

I'd pull up a map of the United States and be like, we could live here. The schools are good here.

Can we play out Nadine's scenario? He texts her.

Yeah.

And you said don't text back.

I do want to change my answer though, just because I feel now, having Natalie said a few more things about it, like now I feel like you should talk to him because I think that's good for you because I think you're just being really avoidant. And then you guys will be like friends forever.

I know exactly what to do.

I know exactly what to do.

We send him this pod.

No, no, no, no, no.

We send it to him. It's over. I think it'll be, if I got this—

this girl is a fucking weirdo.

Or he'll be like, finally, yeah, like, this is really cool.

This is—

yes, I love you. I love hanging out with you. I sat next to you at a club for fucking 3 hours.

Yeah, but then if he doesn't say that, then I'm gonna be sad.

But then you'll know.

Yeah, true.

And then you can go on other dates with other people.

Yeah, yeah, you gotta figure this out. You're like in like this random stalemate.

Yeah, I am. Well, it's also whatever. It's mutual.

Incredible. Well, guys, I definitely think that's all the time we have for you. I don't know how much Natalie I can take.

Sorry, guys.

Sorry.

It really took up a lot of time.

Maybe we'll do another Friday episode that I won't be on. We'll do a Friday-less Natalie. No, but let us know. I'm super curious.

Me too. Please help.

I think there's— wow, this was a very relationship-based episode. Wow. I also have not been in a relationship for like 6, 7 years, so I feel like I'm the worst guy to ask about anything. But, uh, yeah, glad we could all give input on this.

Thank you guys, I appreciate it.

All right, we'll see you guys later. Bye.