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7
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Who's Shannon?
Shannon, my imaginary girlfriend. Yeah, who I ejaculated too early. Even in my fantasies, I just—
I don't know why. I don't know why.
That's why I was futzing with it.
Open the damn computer, 'cause I'm about to transition. I don't know why you have an imaginary girlfriend when you can just sign up for eHarmony.
Oh, that's right, eHarmony.
If you're trying online dating, chances are you've run into lazy text messages, dead-end conversations, and random matches that just don't turn into anything.