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Giving My Nanny a $20,000 Christmas Bonus

Well, they'll do their material. Yeah. You know, got to work some stuff out. But yeah, no, then I did the silent auction. Then I go— then they go like this. They go, they're giving away— the prize is a Greatest Showman package, which is this movie, like Oscar-nominated movie. But it's like really not a great gift at all. It's like a couple of CDs and like a bottle of champagne. I'm like, who the fuck wants this? Nobody wants this. But people are being nice and they're giving like a dollar, whatever. And then they're like, is there anything else we can do? Like, is there— we do like some social media stuff with you or whatever. And I was like, I was like, yeah, I guess I can do like an Instagram shout out or something if you want. And they're like, oh wow, that would be really cool. Instagram, Instagram.

December 14, 201830:22Jason
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David30:04
You guys ever been high on cocaine in Las Vegas. You're just a dad who can't perform at their kid's recital, so he just sticks to what he knows works and hookers and strippers jokes from the past.
Jason30:17
I've seen that at LA dads.
David30:18
A lot of them are stand-ups and they go up on stage and they talk about inappropriate stuff.
Jason30:22
Well, they'll do their material. Yeah. You know, got to work some stuff out. But yeah, no, then I did the silent auction. Then I go— then they go like this. They go, they're giving away— the prize is a Greatest Showman package, which is this movie, like Oscar-nominated movie. But it's like really not a great gift at all. It's like a couple of CDs and like a bottle of champagne. I'm like, who the…
David31:02
So, so they're auctioning off an Instagram shout out.
Jason31:04
Yeah. So that was the other thing. So then they're like, and Jason's, Jason's also also gonna— so after the joke bomb, they're like, oh, Jason's also gonna sweeten the deal like that. And I was like, uh, I was like, guys, if— is anybody on Instagram here? And…
David31:19
Oh my God, this is so fucking awkward.