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What's up, guys? Welcome back to Views, the podcast where it's Christmas time.
Dave, people want to know, will there be stories about masturbating on this Views podcast?
Jason, believe it or not, I actually have a story about jerking off.
Oh my God.
It wouldn't be Christmas without a story about masturbating. Guys, buckle down. Get your family around. Turn the fire on. It's time to talk about jerking off. All right, roll the intro music.
Jack fucking woke me up at 7:30 today.
Jack Reed?