DISCUSSING WHAT HAPPENED

oh, I think there's a lot— I think there's a lot to be said with just that as well. Like, I think that's why I don't want to make the kinds of videos I was making before, was— is— was there was this like pressure to perform. So there was like— like— and not— I don't know, I'm like 50/50 on it because it's like on one side, like, that's how things are made that are great. Like, everybody wants to contribute, everybody wants to make it bigger, everybody wants to make it better. Like, that's how great things are made. Is like people have a motive and people have a desire to make something amazing. And I think that's what helped with my videos is each and every one of my friends wanted to contribute. And the reason they were so good is because all my friends helped me with the videos. And, and yeah, so like on one side, I think like that's exactly how something great is done. But on the other side, I could see how like that environment can get dangerous. So when we got to the hospital, um, um, Jeff was in pretty good spirits. It's a really hard thing to like navigate when you're in the hospital with something like that because you don't know whether or not to be like, like super serious and caring or goofy, right? Like, I don't know how to do that. Um, and I remember, I remember Jeff told me to check my DMs, and it was, it was a video that he found like 15 minutes before the accident that somebody posted and he said, let's recreate this. And it was a guy swinging from an excavator and flying off. I didn't see that DM till the hospital. And he jokes, he's like, I didn't mean literally, haha. Like, he joked. Um, that was the first time I saw the DM. That was the first time I opened it. Um, and then he asked, he's like, can you, can you, can you promise me one thing? And I said, what? And he's like, can you just promise that no one ever knows that this was my idea? And I was like, absolutely. Like That's not a big deal. Um, and then that's the promise I broke recently. Um, and, and I don't know. And, and here's the thing, I don't understand why that bothered him so much, because at the end of the day, I was the one fucking driving it. It was my video. I was the one sitting there. It's fucking clear as day. I am the one controlling the thing. He got hurt because I was driving. That's it. And I fucking know that. And like I said, I would— any chance I would get, I would take that back. Any chance I would get. And, and that, that'll be the biggest regret of my life. My entire life. I really hope there's not a moment that, that I regret as much as that one. Um, um, but yeah. And then we—