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David Starts A Pizza Company
What if— okay, what if the alien's super hot, but the way they have sex is she has to pull out your eyeball? And spit right under and put your eyeball back in. What if it felt good? If it felt good? Well, it feels good for her, but then she'll try to do it to you and you'll try to explain to her like, that's not how our eyes work. And she won't understand. She'll get sad and she'll be pouting in her alien corner.
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I mean, at this point, at this point, I'm trying to find somebody that'll take care of me when I'm old. That's basically where I'm at. Wow.
So you date an alien?
I take an alien, sure.
What if— okay, what if the alien's super hot, but the way they have sex is she has to pull out your eyeball? And spit right under and put your eyeball back in. What if it felt good? If it felt good? Well, it feels good for her, but then she'll try to do it to you and you'll try to explain to her like, that's not how our eyes work. And she won't understand. She'll get sad and she'll be pouting in…
We go to therapy. Jason, do you want to talk a little bit about what your sex life is like? Yeah. My fucking eyes are pulled out of my head. I'm screaming in pain. I don't like it. You're so selfish. You only think about yourself. What about my needs?
You're so selfish.
Then I'd be like, okay, okay, I'll do it.