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The Onion.
World News Daily Report. Maybe the Fountain of Sperm was just one dude just shooting a ton of ropes.
That's what I thought. I thought that too. I was like, there must— I think the Fountain of Sperm, that must be one of the guys' nicknames. Like, it must be just one dude who's like, He was like, oh yeah, that's Mitchell. He's about to do the fountain tonight.…
Jesus.
I mean, that's what it is. That's why, Natalie, I'm just reading stories. We are a news podcast and we like to—
yeah, we like to report on the most important current events.
That's what we do. I have a funny story.