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David's Vlog is for Sale
It's It's a seal slapped a kayaker in the face with an octopus.
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Oh, now come on, that's unnecessary. You didn't have to go there. Boy, we're having a decent argument about pulp and no pulp, and what do you do? Talk about putting your dick in my mouth. Thanks a lot.
Joe just pulled up another article, and I— this one, I will— this one, I'll be honest with you, I think this one's bullshit. The title of it— I'm gonna read it. I— it's, it's under the animal section.
You'd be the worst newscaster.
It's It's a seal slapped a kayaker in the face with an octopus.
Now, hot stories.
Now, it makes you think, right? Like, what is this octopus going through that it had to use a seal to slap it rather than its 8 tentacles? It's just, it really puts you in a spot.
I'm David Dobrik with the nightly news. There's a bunch of stories that my friends gave me, and some of them may be real, some of them may not be.