David's Looking for a New Co-Host

I've been with my boyfriend Noah for a long time, and I love him so much it's crazy. Please change his name. Oh fuck, I've been with my friend. You guys, don't say the fucking person's name and then ask to change his name. Just give me a different name in the email. I don't need to know that his real name is Noah. Anyway, okay, since we've started— since we've started dating, he's fallen into a deep drug addiction. Oh fuck, he's always high or tripping on acid or doing some other illegal substance. Last week he actually punched David in the face at a party. Get the This is him. I am the complete opposite. Never smoke or do any drugs. I only have the occasional drink or so.