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Caught Him Flirting With My Mom
She was scared because on the news there was a burglar running around. Around. Sure. And there's a helicopter above our house looking for this burglar.
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I just felt weird, like, I felt like in that instance, like, you came to her rescue, so then why— I felt weird that I was there, that was like sort of your time to shine.
Well, you were there 'cause you were hitting on her. I'm kidding, Jason wasn't hitting on her. You said the dumbest thing. What did I say?
You go— I go— you go, Liza thinks there's someone at her place, that's why I left. I wrote, what? Fuck. Is she okay? You wrote, she's scared. I'm on FaceTime with her now trying to get over there with Hollywood Bowl. I wrote, you want me to go the other way,…
She was scared because on the news there was a burglar running around. Around. Sure. And there's a helicopter above our house looking for this burglar.
Sure. And I've—
well, then that—
I didn't know that part. That's totally valid. And I've been alone in the house with no helicopters above me and think that someone's gonna kill me. So then you tell me to call the police.